Tuesday, June 25, 2013

A Win-Win


When I was in 7th grade, my dad was diagnosed with a very rare form of cancer. Needless to say, our lives were thrown for a loop.  Up until that point, cancer hadn’t invaded our immediate family, so when the prognosis quickly became grim, it literally felt like there was nowhere to turn.  We were so fortunate to have the love and support of many family members and friends. Yet, despite all of the sympathy and kind gestures, the cancer wasn’t going anywhere.  I came to know Fairfax Hospital all too well, and we were constantly scooping up all of the Veryfine fruit punch juice that stores had in stock, as it’s all that my dad could stomach.  Although my parents were doing everything in their power to stay positive and upbeat, emotions were getting the best of everyone at different points in time.  That’s where Life with Cancer came in and forever changed my life.
Life with Cancer was a small outpost from the hospital, where services were provided for those fighting cancer, as well as their family members.  At a time when life was hormonal and confusing  enough to begin with, throwing the black cloud that was cancer into the picture made teenage life infinitely more bewildering.  Yet, when I walked into the Life with Cancer building on Juniper Street, I was safe.  Shara Sosa (unrelated to Sammy Sosa, although I asked her almost every week), was my angel and took me under her wing.  Along with other kids whose parents were battling cancer, we would discuss those emotions and concerns that were far too frightening to discuss anywhere else.  We would write our dreams and wishes on balloons and send them off into the endless skyline, in hopes that someone out there would be answering our calls.  When the chemo wasn’t working and I was barely able to recognize the dad who had been out chasing me on the basketball court six months ago, Life with Cancer was there to provide the reinforcements that we all so desperately needed.  When doctor after doctor opted to not operate on my dad in fear that the operation itself would kill him, Life with Cancer was there for me to share the words and sentiments that were too vulgar to share elsewhere.  Despite the bleak outlook, we finally found a surgeon at Sloan Kettering in New York who was willing to take on the risky operation.  Obviously, we are also forever in debt to Dr. Bains, as my dad is still alive and well today with no signs of cancer.
Even though the days spent fighting cancer are far gone,  I appreciate the time that I spent at Life with Cancer just as much today as I did years ago.  Beyond that, it’s been absolutely incredible to see how much the organization and grown over the past fifteen years.  Instead of the small hall on Juniper St., Life with Cancer now lives in an incredible home 100% dedicated to their services.  When I moved back to the area after college, I knew that it was time to reconnect with this incredible organization.  When I first met with them to discuss the possibility of volunteering at the house, one of the first things I was asked was if I felt too connected to the cause, to the point where it would impact my ability to keep my emotions in check. My answer? I didn’t know, but I did know that there were little Maria’s out there who needed a Shara to take their mind off of the hell that they were going through day in and day out. 
To be honest, it is hard to not get emotional when I’m playing bingo with a twelve year old that’s hooked up to a feeding tube, or talking to a mom whose daughter only has months to live. I know that they need me though, and frankly, I need them.  Volunteering is a win-win for everyone involved. I know, I know, we’re all incredibly busy and the thought of squeezing in yet another commitment is daunting, but the time that I spend volunteering is the time that I most look forward to each month.  Not because I feel like I’ve done my civic duty, but because I’ve been on the other end of it and know that those moments of escape can mean the world to those who are wishing the cancer away every moment of every day. 
Clearly Life with Cancer is not the only organization or cause out there that needs volunteers.  I honestly don’t know that I would have found them had it not been for my personal connection, but I feel so thankful and fortunate that I have.  I know that this post is long and pretty heavy, but if you’ve made it this far, then I encourage you to click over to the interwebs and find some sort of volunteering position that peaks your interest.  There are so many groups and people out there in need of various support systems, and I’m a strong believer in the idea that the love that you put forth in life will be bundled up and returned when you need it at some point down the road. 

If you’re interested in giving back to the community in some capacity, here are some links of potential interest:

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