tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-56566371551425346682024-03-12T23:58:06.543-07:00Be Nice. Work Hard.So many gods, so many creeds, so many paths that wind and wind, while just the art of being kind is all the sad world needs. <br>-Ella Wheeler WilcoxMariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.comBlogger243125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5656637155142534668.post-11611199522144195392022-06-16T13:55:00.009-07:002022-06-16T18:53:19.711-07:00Neurodiverse Parenting: One Year In <div style="text-align: left;"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiauOemFNwn5dO-dgjGffd9RxkGbvTuEwyKfL4NHGS14AUjzyoL2EDJq9Xfe5KmyhV0ykI-3ydcR8841o8KIbP5RY3EaFg2h1yWmkzLrC9nPucTF5PCeCVk_MuzZX69Lw-dSIF2e6_caa9n3CndSND3k9sFAtq9BofpauyFATlpN83dMchTm6gg6QofUQ/s2968/2D9E8E7F-4ABD-4318-BAF3-E0741BFBA8C0.jpg" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2968" data-original-width="2375" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiauOemFNwn5dO-dgjGffd9RxkGbvTuEwyKfL4NHGS14AUjzyoL2EDJq9Xfe5KmyhV0ykI-3ydcR8841o8KIbP5RY3EaFg2h1yWmkzLrC9nPucTF5PCeCVk_MuzZX69Lw-dSIF2e6_caa9n3CndSND3k9sFAtq9BofpauyFATlpN83dMchTm6gg6QofUQ/s320/2D9E8E7F-4ABD-4318-BAF3-E0741BFBA8C0.jpg" width="256" /></a></div><br /><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial; font-size: x-small;"><br /></span></div><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial; font-size: x-small;"><br /></span></div><p style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial; font-size: x-small;"><br /></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial; font-size: x-small;">I</span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial;">t’s been a little over a year since we received Avery’s diagnoses of Level I Autism and ADHD and there have been a lot of feelings packed into 365 days. I always come back to the fact that a diagnosis and label doesn’t change a thing about a person. If anything, it only opens more doors in terms of services and resources. In general, people still tend to have a sorrowful response when they learn that Avery has Autism. However, for us, we see it has a set of superpowers that she has and will continue to have for her whole life.</span></p><div style="text-align: left;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: arial;"><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt; text-align: left;"><span style="font-family: arial;">This past spring was the first time that we had an open discussion with Avery about her</span><span style="font-family: arial;"> Autism. She knows that she has severe ADHD and that she takes medicine to help her focus and regulate. However, Autism isn’t as easy to nail down from a kid's perspective, so we held off on diving in on that one. When we did talk about it this year, though, we shared that everyone’s brain has a bunch of wires in it that help us think, feel, and act, and that some people’s wiring looks a little different. Avery’s diverse wiring gives her the superpowers of unmatched empathy, an incredibly sharp memory, a musical mind, and many more superpowers that not everyone else has. It also means that sometimes she can be very rigid and that her flight or fight response can be very strong in situations where it isn’t for other people. Things that aren’t triggering for other kiddos her age might be very triggering for her, and she knows that we’re constantly developing systems together as a family to help us navigate the situations that prompt the big responses. I think anyone who knows Avery will attest to the fact that she is one of the biggest lovebugs that you’ll ever meet. She emotes in a big, big way across the spectrum of emotions and at the end of the day, we wouldn’t change a thing about her.</span></div><p class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;"><span style="font-family: arial;"> </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;"><span style="font-family: arial;">From a parental perspective, there are so many lessons that we continue to learn. Here are some of them:</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;"><span style="font-family: arial;">- It’s hard (nearly impossible?!) to do this alone. Finding specialists around your child’s needs is life changing. Between Avery’s psychologist, occupational therapist, speech therapists, psychiatrist, etc., we have found such a strong network of support. It never escapes me how privileged and fortunate we are to have found such incredible specialists that have helped us navigate uncharted territory. Avery knows that each one of these adults is there to help her.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;"><span style="font-family: arial;">-Social situations are often challenging. I wish that I could say that this only goes for new social environments, but it doesn’t. Some days, even the most routine situations can set off a five alarm fire and it’s just life with a neurodiverse kiddo. Families that know us well know that there may be days when we simply must bolt and while it’s not ideal, it’s life. It’s unpredictable and can be messy.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;"><span style="font-family: arial;">-Setting up systems around recurring triggers is super helpful. Some of our biggest triggers are weather, bugs/birds, and big crowds. We almost always have the weather app at our fingertips, we will often show up on the earlier or later side of events with noise cancelling headphones in tow, and in terms of bugs and birds…I’ve got nothing, ha! If anyone has any advice on the last one, we’re all ears!!</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;"><span style="font-family: arial;">-Neurodiversity is hard on a marriage. Yes- I said it! Just like any situation that requires endless attention and one that can create unpredictable stress at any given day and time, it takes a toll. The most difficult part for us is the unpredictability that every day brings because you constantly feel like you’re walking around on pins and needles. CP and I have had our moments where we are at our wits end with each other and throw our hands up in the air (and then take some space). At the end of the day, though, there’s absolutely no one else that I would want to have as a partner in neurodiverse parenting. We respect and create space for each other’s ideas and opinions and know that we’re both human beings with feelings, too.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;"><span style="font-family: arial;">-Sibling life can be tough. I think about this a lot with Harper. In a lot of ways, having a neurodiverse sister has made her a more flexible and adaptable kiddo. She’s also subject to a lot of unjustified outbursts and erratic behaviors, though, and it’s hard not to worry about that. That being said, Aves and Harper have an incredible bond that is remarkable to observe (especially as an only child myself). They are one another’s biggest cheerleaders and are fiercely protective of each other. It’s important for us to remember, though, that Harper needs support in ways that are less obvious but just as significant.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;"><span style="font-family: arial;">- Not everyone will understand, and that’s okay. The longer we’ve been doing the neurodiverse parenting gig, the better I’ve gotten and just letting it goooooo. The energy spent on worrying about the stares, comments, or advice given from others is simply not worth it. Period.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;"><span style="font-family: arial;">-Our circle is small but fierce. As an extrovert myself, I’ve had to adjust expectations around involvement in activities and social circles in general. Frankly, it’s been a bit of a relief! We know that Avery thrives in small groups with familiar people and it has taken a lot of pressure off buying into the pressure cooker of commitments that is Northern Virginia.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;"><span style="font-family: arial;">-Don’t let others downplay your situation. We’ve had some well-meaning people say that Avery doesn’t “seem” Autistic. While I believe the comment is meant to be comforting, no one knows the intricacies of a neurodiverse child and family other than <i>that family</i>. Avery masks *incredibly* well in certain situations, which is both a blessing and a curse. It’s always helpful to lead with an open and empathetic heart, knowing that many families are struggling on different levels behind the scenes (whether it involves neurodiversity or not).</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;"><span style="font-family: arial;">-It’s okay to resent your kiddo at times AND love them with every cell of your being. There have been many times when I’ve wondered how different our life might look without a child with Autism. It’s a natural wondering! Avery is fiercely attached to me, despite so much work around boundaries and space between us. Does this mean there are days when I nearly lose my mind on her? Absolutely. Yet, I wouldn’t change a thing about Avery or our family. In a lot of ways, she’s the best thing that has ever happened to us.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;"><span style="font-family: arial;">-The road will be ever-changing. The triggers now may not be the triggers next year and, conversely, the things that work this year may not work next year. It’s hard not to ponder what life with a neurodiverse kiddo will look like down the road. I joke with Chris that Avery will be living with us when she’s 40 because she’s so attached to me! At the end of the day, though, our family’s love will always carry us through anything, along with the help of our extraordinary support system. We’ll weather the highs and lows with a deep respect and understanding for one another, which is all that any of us can ask for in this life. </span></p>Mariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5656637155142534668.post-64204719033760088632021-11-21T17:12:00.008-08:002021-11-21T17:21:17.907-08:00Gift Guide 2021<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgF6O5WYq5tgbO8OPus69TPX2xLnZf6EW0k3t8sowKK08eAPuk0bBNbyedhqr8x9oCUwkdUHkByOEm51ga0BQuPRrzMlL_0E2X9f8KQ7IeeiizSAZnm5QihlKs2ygauVGw-PjSmj9YMkhnH/s2048/joel-muniz-xTkxZN_DV8o-unsplash.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="1365" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgF6O5WYq5tgbO8OPus69TPX2xLnZf6EW0k3t8sowKK08eAPuk0bBNbyedhqr8x9oCUwkdUHkByOEm51ga0BQuPRrzMlL_0E2X9f8KQ7IeeiizSAZnm5QihlKs2ygauVGw-PjSmj9YMkhnH/s320/joel-muniz-xTkxZN_DV8o-unsplash.jpeg" width="213" /></a></div><br /><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: helvetica; font-weight: 700; white-space: pre-wrap;"><br /></span></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><span style="font-family: helvetica; font-weight: 700; white-space: pre-wrap;">Gift Guide!</span></div><p><b id="docs-internal-guid-a2bfa51b-7fff-efe4-8eb4-69fbc7f8e54e" style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><br /></span></b></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;">Female, minority-owned small businesses: </span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Pat’s Granola- </span><a href="https://patsgranola.com/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://patsgranola.com/</span></a><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> (Hands down, the best granola EVER)</span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Oh Happy Dani goods (inclusive quotes on cards, shirts, prints, etc.) - </span><a href="https://ohhappydani.com/shop/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://ohhappydani.com/shop/</span></a></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Mahogany Books- </span><a href="https://www.mahoganybooks.com/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://www.mahoganybooks.com/</span></a></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Arise for Jewelry - </span><a href="https://arisefor.square.site/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://arisefor.square.site/</span></a></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Nothing In Between Studio (non-toxic nail care and spa in Falls Church)- </span><a href="https://nothinginbetweenstudio.com/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://nothinginbetweenstudio.com/</span></a></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The Tiny Tassel jewelry and accessories: </span><a href="https://thetinytassel.com/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://thetinytassel.com/</span></a></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Thulisa Naturals bath and body products- </span><a href="https://thulisanaturals.com" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://thulisanaturals.com</span></a></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">More Than Your Average (plus size vintage clothing and accessories in DC) - </span><a href="https://www.morethanyouraverage.com/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://www.morethanyouraverage.com/</span></a></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Organic Impression notecards, journals, and bags- </span><a href="https://www.organicimpression.com/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://www.organicimpression.com/</span></a></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Kess Hair and Skincare in Falls Church- </span><a href="https://www.kessfc.com/hair" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://www.kessfc.com/hair</span></a></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The Spice Suite in DC- </span><a href="https://www.thespicesuite.com" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://www.thespicesuite.com</span></a></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Karina Gaull Handbags- </span><a href="https://www.karinagaull.com/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://www.karinagaull.com/</span></a></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Bright Black non-toxic candles: </span><a href="https://brightblackcandles.com/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://brightblackcandles.com/</span></a></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Oyah Natural Skincare- </span><a href="https://oyahnaturalskincare.com/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://oyahnaturalskincare.com/</span></a></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Feminist Book Club: </span><a href="https://www.feministbookclub.com" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://www.feministbookclub.com</span></a></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">JoyLife Spa (Fairfax): </span><a href="https://www.joylifespa.com" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://www.joylifespa.com</span></a></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">KSM Candle Co. candles, candle kits, and artisanal goods: </span><a href="https://www.knitssoyandmetal.com/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://www.knitssoyandmetal.com/</span></a></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Granddaddy’s Skillet restaurant in Alexandria: </span><a href="https://www.facebook.com/Granddaddys-Skillet-103338874918419/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://www.facebook.com/Granddaddys-Skillet-103338874918419/</span></a></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">OmMade Peanut Butter: </span><a href="https://www.ommadepb.com/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://www.ommadepb.com/</span></a></span></p><p><b style="font-weight: normal;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><br /></span></b></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 700; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;">Other non-minority female owned small businesses: </span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">The Bee and the Fox- wonderfully empowering shirts and items for females and kiddos : </span><a href="https://www.thebeeandthefox.com/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://www.thebeeandthefox.com/</span></a></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Oat Haus granola butter (formerly Kween&Co): </span><a href="https://oat.haus/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://oat.haus/</span></a></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;">Fountains Day Spa (Old Town Alexandria): https://fountainsdayspa.com/</span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;">Balanced Female Fitness (NoVa, but also has a digital library): https://www.balancedfemalefitness.com/</span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Small batch artisanal caramels: </span><a href="https://www.lavachemicrocreamery.com/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://www.lavachemicrocreamery.com/</span></a><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;"> </span></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">100 Bowls of Soup (Herndon): </span><a href="https://100bowlsonline.square.site/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://100bowlsonline.square.site/</span></a></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">SAT and other test prep: </span><a href="https://www.bestprep.com/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://www.bestprep.com/</span></a></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Rose and Resilience handmade accessories: </span><a href="https://www.roseandresilience.com/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://www.roseandresilience.com/</span></a></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">BlackNerd Coffee: </span><a href="https://blacknerdcoffee.com/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://blacknerdcoffee.com/</span></a></span></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Botanologica- plants, décor, flowers: </span><a href="http://www.botanologica.com/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">http://www.botanologica.com/</span></a></span></p><p></p><p dir="ltr" style="line-height: 1.295; margin-bottom: 8pt; margin-top: 0pt;"><span style="font-family: helvetica;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: black; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration: none; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">Branch Basics non-toxic home cleaning supplies: </span><a href="https://branchbasics.com/" style="text-decoration: none;"><span style="background-color: transparent; color: #0563c1; font-style: normal; font-variant: normal; font-weight: 400; text-decoration-skip-ink: none; text-decoration: underline; vertical-align: baseline; white-space: pre-wrap;">https://branchbasics.com/</span></a></span></p><div><span style="font-family: helvetica; font-size: x-small;"><br /></span></div><p><span style="font-family: helvetica; font-size: x-small;"><br /></span></p><p><br /></p>Mariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5656637155142534668.post-6104544175781735402021-09-28T13:50:00.001-07:002021-09-28T13:57:39.098-07:00Shame, I'm Murdering You<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYFeGU1uNm__Jr-ooqPCgw4cDBnTuWhmqqVlJBanmICGI4qBTT9abm9NGLEKBFFndjis0idzoLi3gmAH9DM5dGsTV6y13XxE_Xilbc1-V-fRhBovdNEaQWvGVeLa7lLNo83jBJO7PTrmDm/s2048/PIKE+FALL+2020-85.jpeg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1365" data-original-width="2048" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYFeGU1uNm__Jr-ooqPCgw4cDBnTuWhmqqVlJBanmICGI4qBTT9abm9NGLEKBFFndjis0idzoLi3gmAH9DM5dGsTV6y13XxE_Xilbc1-V-fRhBovdNEaQWvGVeLa7lLNo83jBJO7PTrmDm/s320/PIKE+FALL+2020-85.jpeg" width="320" /></a></div><br /><p><br /></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; text-indent: 0.5in;"><span> </span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; text-indent: 0.5in;"><span><br /></span></span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; text-indent: 0.5in;"><span><span> </span> </span>Despite an incredible amount of growth during several years of Cognitive Behavioral Therapy, there was one part that I could never nail down. To really move through situations riddled with anxiety and anger, my therapist would have me travel to the depths of my emotions and envision how I would react to a situation if there were no rules or consequences. Within those four walls, anything was safe. Screaming, violence, you name it - it was all allowed. The idea was that once the anger was truly out there, there was space to move past it with clarity. I tried and tried (and tried!) to really go there but I was often met with fear and trepidation over what my anger could look like if I fully unleashed it. Fast forward to six years later and I have</span><span style="font-size: 11pt; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><b style="font-size: 11pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">arrived</b><span style="font-size: 11pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">. I have arrived at the point where I am unabashedly tearing a big and scary monster to pieces on a regular basis. That monster is Shame.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; text-indent: 0.5in;"><span> </span>Shame started to creep into my life about a year ago when we realized that something was off kilter with our oldest daughter, then five years old. The tantrums, fears, and general behaviors that you might expect from a younger child were occurring with high frequency, and they began drawing more and more attention in public. While receiving a diagnosis of Autism and ADHD was certainly helpful in many ways, neither of those diagnoses changed our reality. Our reality is that on a very regular basis, our daughter acts out in ways that attract stares and comments from people. </span><i style="font-size: 11pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">Shame, Shame, Shame</i><span style="font-size: 11pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">“You really have your hands full.”</p><p class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">“Do you ever just say no to her?”</p><p class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">“Goodness, someone really needs a nap.”</p><p class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">I can’t count the number of times that I have wanted to crawl into a hole and disappear in these moments. Shame creeps in swiftly and severely. It wraps its long arms around me and tells me that we’re not deserving of the everyday activities and outings that most families are able to pull off with ease.</p><p class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; text-indent: 0.5in;"><span> </span>There was a moment this summer, though, when it all finally clicked. I decided that I was ready to go full throttle with my anger and to murder Shame. We were at the pool and there was a bird. Yes- a bird. THE FREAKING BIRDS. They’ve been a trigger this summer and have spoiled many family adventures (neurodiverse parents, I see you nodding your head!). As the bird pranced around the gazebo, our daughter started shrieking and running in every which direction. The problem was, there were *lots* of birds in every direction. Each pivot to escape was met with another high-pitched scream and cry. As heads turned and eyes widened, I decided that I’d had it. I couldn’t let Shame take the wheel once again. It was time to tear Shame to pieces and bury it six feet under. </span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; text-indent: 0.5in;"><span> </span>The truth is that if I continued to let Shame control me, I would be the one six feet under. How do we get past it, though? How do we live in our truth confidently without letting Shame steer us to the depths of despair? For me, I needed a swift kick in the butt when it came to my perspective. What if, instead of feeling small in these situations, I leaned into the idea that some people are not able to get vulnerable with our family? What if I leaned into the fact that they don’t know our full story and can’t see the absolute magic that occurs in tandem alongside the most challenging moments and days? Anyone who is living with a neurodiverse kiddo will tell you</span><span style="font-size: 11pt; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><u style="font-size: 11pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">just</u><span style="font-size: 11pt; text-indent: 0.5in;"> </span><span style="font-size: 11pt; text-indent: 0.5in;">that: there is MAGIC. The people who stare, the people who sneer, and the people who make comments that tear you down instead of lifting you up are simply not meant to live in that magical space with you. They’re not worthy of your family’s full story that is bursting with so much love and joy (okay, except when there are birds).</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;"><span style="font-size: 11pt; text-indent: 0.5in;"><span> </span>Shame is such a small, small person when you realize the strength and affection that exists within your circle. The circle that knows your story and loves you for it – or in spite of it. The circle that, despite your biggest fears, will continue showing up for you time and time again. The circle that doesn’t bat an eye when you need to bolt while carrying your kiddo away torpedo style. The circle that loves your neurodiverse child and your family for who they are at their core.</span></p><p class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;"> </p><p class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: Calibri, sans-serif; font-size: 11pt; line-height: 15.6933px; margin: 0in 0in 8pt;">Shame, your run was short-lived, and our lives are better off without you in it. I don’t doubt that you’ll creep in from time to time, but I know that our circle’s love will kick you to the curb every single time.</p><div><br /></div>Mariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5656637155142534668.post-85239677669601712332021-03-30T06:20:00.004-07:002021-03-30T16:55:55.207-07:00How I Knew It Was Time<p></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEGoj9lUWSbC8508mCgvWjUu0YdunG8MpvTlJMndKWy1nlD1giUOKVzuyTkDKq_8Ex0FqhqwQfiZS1jW87cnA37OiZJekmbbJbXYa5Hp0X3YEVcRKyYfs1NnSFcPhha72ZX18muWiSVK4L/s2048/IMG_4997.HEIC" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="2048" data-original-width="1536" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjEGoj9lUWSbC8508mCgvWjUu0YdunG8MpvTlJMndKWy1nlD1giUOKVzuyTkDKq_8Ex0FqhqwQfiZS1jW87cnA37OiZJekmbbJbXYa5Hp0X3YEVcRKyYfs1NnSFcPhha72ZX18muWiSVK4L/s320/IMG_4997.HEIC" /></a></div> <p></p><p><br /></p><p>Hiiiii!! I'm so excited to be back to blogging with a bit more frequency (hopefully). I feel like Instagram has been my pseudo-blog platform for a bit now and while I mostly love Instagram, nothing can replace the written word on here. </p><p>Since I shared that I'm leaving teaching a few weeks ago, the top two responses have been: "How did you know it was time?" and "What's next?". </p><p>I've always felt called to give back, which is how I landed in teaching in the first place. It felt like a natural fit and it has been for the past twelve years. Ironically, when I started teaching, I felt like it would be a two or three year gig before I hopped into admin or educational policy, but alas, the joy of the classroom was too much to walk away from. Never did I imagine that I'd be one of the last classroom teachers standing from my graduating class (this is a sad reality that I'll address in another post). </p><p>That being said, I've felt called to more for a bit now. It's hard to describe, but <a href="https://www.blogger.com/u/1/blog/post/edit/5656637155142534668/3402754266840959359" target="_blank">if you read this post from 2016</a> then you'll see that the feeling has been brewing for some time now. Motherhood, routine, and comfort called though and I happily stayed in the classroom. "<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">More than anything, I want to continue being grateful for this life, for the opportunities to fall and to get back up, and for the chance to fill this Earth with love." (2016). I teared up reading that from 2016 because I know that this feeling has been bubbling at the surface for some time and while part of me is a bit surprised that it has taken me this long to get here, I have so much grace for myself given the insane life transitions that have transpired over the past five years. </span></p><p><span style="color: #222222;"><span style="background-color: white;">In total transparency, I knew that it was time to leave two years ago -so much so that I asked for a sabbatical that spring for the following school year. It wasn't met with much enthusiasm and while the decision was 100% mine, I stayed -but mostly out of guilt. I still loved teaching and continued to pour my heart into the job every single day, but once again, the feeling of being called to more was not only present, but was boiling over at this point.</span></span></p><p><span style="color: #222222;"><span style="background-color: white;">The irony, of course, is that during that summer and into the fall my health fell to pieces. Life as I knew it would be turned upside down with my Hypophysitis diagnosis and it has taken time to reach a new, sustainable normal. So here we are again: how did I know *this* was the time? Well, between my health and already having had asked for a break prior to this, I knew that it was a natural second request at this point. I'm halfway through a full career with FCPS and I do think that I'll be back in some capacity at some point. Like some of you, I grew up in a house with parents who poured their heart and souls into jobs that they knew would secure a solid retirement. While I have so much respect for that, my dad died a year after his retirement. This changed my perspective on life in so many ways, including around my career. We get this one life and I don't want to settle for comfort and routine. </span></span></p><p><span style="color: #222222;"><span style="background-color: white;">SO! Long story long, I've known it was time to step outside my career for a while, but it took a few years for everything to come to fruition. I'm glad that it took time and I've never resented anything about my time in the classroom- quite the opposite. That being said, change is scary and change is good.</span></span></p><p>In terms of what's next- eeeeks! So many exciting unknows currently. There's a small business brewing behind the scenes that I'll share more about when I' m further along with it, but it is something that I'm so flipping excited about and is an ode to my dad in many ways. There are also some other opportunities knocking that I'm very much looking forward to pursuing. More than anything, though, I'm looking forward to exploring some new spaces in my life. I've always been such a go-getter and have to stay busy to feel accomplished. While this has served me well overall, it's also a flawed approach in so many ways. I know what a privilege it is to have this chance to pause, reboot, and launch. It's truly something that I'm grateful for and excited about. </p><p>There you have it. It has taken a looong time to get here and I'm so excited for these new adventures. They may fail, but I'll never know if I don't try. </p><p><br /></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/ftkJNilA4Ao" width="320" youtube-src-id="ftkJNilA4Ao"></iframe></div><br /><p><br /></p><p> </p><p><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><br /></span></p><p><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><br /></span></p><p><br /></p>Mariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5656637155142534668.post-4151676160371390392020-11-20T18:30:00.005-08:002020-11-20T18:42:27.933-08:00THE Shop Small and Local Post!!!<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRscsVLxZwNsS2UVk9lfyvTHgMMfaTzP9LZrEYCzG2wRMH4a0dKPwtvQQ4ZBj90ZKZWNaqZ7_jy01MyYpizeLm5qz36XeJzqcMc4efs_Adcc0g9eXUOz6foq6P_di5DVafg6F-P42PfpBJ/" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img alt="" data-original-height="300" data-original-width="300" height="240" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiRscsVLxZwNsS2UVk9lfyvTHgMMfaTzP9LZrEYCzG2wRMH4a0dKPwtvQQ4ZBj90ZKZWNaqZ7_jy01MyYpizeLm5qz36XeJzqcMc4efs_Adcc0g9eXUOz6foq6P_di5DVafg6F-P42PfpBJ/" width="240" /></a></div><br /><p><br /></p><p>Alright friends, it's heeeeere! Your ultimate guide to shopping small this holiday season. I hope that you discover some great finds on this list. <3</p><p><br /></p><p><b>FOOD related:</b></p><p><a href="https://patsgranola.com/" target="_blank">The BEST granola you will ever eat</a>. Pat pours her heart and soul into this granola and gosh can you taste it. I order a ton of small bags at the holidays for friends, teachers, etc..<br /></p><p><a href="https://kween.co/collections/all" target="_blank">Kween Granola Butter</a> Can you tell that I love granola products?! If you follow me on Insta then you know that I am positively obsessed with Ali's granola butter. I put in oats and yogurt, on toast, or eat it straight from the spoon. It's also a great alternative for nut-free environments!<br /></p><p><a href="https://deansbeans.com/" target="_blank">Dean's Beans Coffee </a> A friend recommended Dean's Beans and I'm excited to try their coffee!<br /></p><p><a href="https://www.ommadepb.com/collections/peanut-butters" target="_blank">OmMade Peanut Butter </a> Hand-crafted flavored peanut butter? YES.</p><p><a href="https://esquireconfections.webs.com/" target="_blank">Esquire Confections</a> Amanda is a local mom who makes incredible cakes and baked goods tailored to your preference! We've ordered many cakes from her and they are always amazing.</p><p><a href="https://redtruckbakery.com/" target="_blank"> Red Truck Bakery </a> Well-known across the country for their delicious baked goods, Red Truck Bakery has two local storefronts in Warrenton and Marshall, Va. That being said, they also ship their delectable treats all over the country! Did someone say rum cake???<br /></p><p><a href="https://gratisfied.com/shop" target="_blank">Gratisfied Empower Bars</a> I am obsessed with Empower Bars. Developed by a fellow UVA alum, these are such a nutritional powerhouse.<br /></p><p><a href="https://www.etsy.com/shop/MyChocolateShoppe" target="_blank">Clean Conscience Chocolate</a> I came across this chocolate randomly on a road trip and it's AMAZING for those of us that have a lot of dietary restrictions. The chocolate PB cups and the coconut cups are out of this world. CP, are you reading this? :)<br /></p><p><a href="http://www.sweetsbye.com/" target="_blank">SweetsBye</a> Another local baker that puts out amazing custom work.<br /></p><p><a href="https://www.happytartbakery.com/" target="_blank">The Happy Tart</a> If you're local and anyone in your circle is gluten sensitive, you must go here! So many delicious options. <br /></p><p>*Additionally, consider purchasing gift cards/certificates for favorite local, non-chain restaurants and cafes that can be redeemed down the road in person or for takeout!</p><p><b>KID related:</b></p><p><a href="https://www.pufferbelliestoys.com/" target="_blank">Pufferbellies Toys</a> You know those amazing toy stores that seemingly no longer exist? Pufferbellies is your spot. They have it ALL and they deliver! Their book section is hands down my favorite of anywhere I've shopped.<br /></p><p><a href="https://www.doodlehopper.com/" target="_blank">Doodlehopper</a> This toy store is also wonderful, particularly if you're in NoVa and want to see things in person. We frequent Doodlehopper for birthday gifts!</p><p><a href="https://www.stitchyfish.com/" target="_blank">Stitchy Fish</a> I recently discovered Stitchy Fish through Instagram (#theygotme) and it is adorable clothing that is preppy but not over the top. They also have smocked items if that is your jam.</p><p><a href="https://shutterbugs-boutique.myshopify.com/" target="_blank">Shutterbugs Boutique </a>Another adorable kiddos clothing store out of North Carolina.</p><p><a href="https://mapleandlark.com/" target="_blank">Maple and Lark </a> Darling eco-friendly gifts for the little ones in your life!<br /></p><p><a href="https://www.roseandrex.com/" target="_blank">Rose and Rex</a> An assortment of great toys that inspire creativity.</p><p><br /></p><p><b>GENERAL GIFTS:</b></p><p><a href="https://www.theurbanfarmhousestore.com/s/shop" target="_blank">The Urban Farmhouse</a> Located in Arlington, this adorable shop has lots of great finds for all sorts of people in your life. From art to vintage goods and to holiday decor- they have you covered.<br /></p><p><a href="https://www.covetinarlington.com/shop?Collection=All&page=3" target="_blank">Covet</a> Next to The Urban Farmhouse is Covet! Whereas the former has more homey gifts, Covet has smaller, more quirky stuff. It feels like you're shopping a bunch of awesome Etsy stores all under one roof!<br /></p><p>*Both The Urban Farmhouse and Covet have an online store with delivery.</p><p><a href="https://made-va.shopsettings.com/" target="_blank">MadeVA</a> Another AWESOME gift store out of Staunton, Virginia. I always find the best gifts here and their online store has just about everything that they have to offer in person, too. <br /></p><p><a href="https://thetinytassel.com/collections/mimis-picks" target="_blank">The Tiny Tassel</a> Fun jewelry and accessories fill this adorable shop!! I'm eyeing some headbands for the holidays!<br /></p><p><a href="http://www.botanologica.com/" target="_blank">Botanologica</a> A darling store in Falls Church City, Botanologica is a must for any plant lovers in your life. They have an incredible assortment of unique plants that are impressively priced.<br /></p><p><a href="https://rachelmulherin.com/collections" target="_blank">Rachel Mulherin Jewelry</a> I've been a fan of Baltimore native Rachel's jewelry for years. It is just so unique and stunning. I may have picked up a few pieces recently and I just love them so much. <br /></p><p><a href="https://www.sweatybands.com/collections/shop-all" target="_blank">SweatyBands</a> Hands down the best non-slip headbands! I have so many (the 3/8 inch and 5/8 inch width are my favorite) and there are endless fun designs.<br /></p><p><a href="https://deborah-williamson.squarespace.com/lavender-shop?category=All%20Products" target="_blank">Seven Oaks Lavender Fam </a>If lavender is your jam, this is your spot to buy from. They have all things lavender from yoga mat spray to candles to tea.<br /></p><p><a href="https://christinakober.com/" target="_blank">Christina Kober Jewelry</a> Owned by a friend's sister, Christina has stunning pieces that would make the perfect gift. Her bar necklaces would be perfect for a mama in your life.<br /></p><p><br /></p><p><b>BOOKS </b>(please please please consider purchasing books from local, small bookstores!):</p><p><a href="https://www.mahoganybooks.com/" target="_blank">Mahogany Books</a> Based in DC, Mahogany Books is owned by power couple Derrick and Ramunda Young. They write, <span style="font-family: inherit;">"<span style="background-color: white;">We take a leadership role in the African American community by promoting reading, writing, and cultural awareness as tools to improve self-esteem, self-love and ultimately our communities to enrich the lives of motivated individuals."</span></span></p><p><a href="https://www.onemorepagebooks.com/" target="_blank">One More Page</a>- A wonderful locally owned bookstore that ships everywhere! <br /></p><p><br /></p><p><b>SERVICES:</b></p><p>Ivy Calvert, Wardrobe Stylist (@calvertandco.styling on Instagram): This is the service that you never knew you needed and you totally need. As someone who loves clothes, I've never nailed down a style....until Ivy! From a style consult to a wardrobe edit, Ivy will have you covered with tips and tricks to streamline your wardrobe and style. For me, paying for her service cuts down on a LOT of wasted money on clothing down the road.</p><p><a href="https://www.balancedfemalefitness.com/" target="_blank">Balanced Female Fitness </a>My lifesaver in regards to my fitness and sanity. I've realized how much a sense of community inspires me with my fitness as I've gotten older and you will not find a more supportive and uplifting group of females anywhere else. With a digital library and tons of online classes, you don't have to be local to join either!<br /></p><p><a href="https://fountainsdayspa.com/" target="_blank">Fountains Day Spa</a> Located in the heart of Old Town Alexandria, my mom and I have been going to Fountains for facials and massages since I was in high school! While you may not feel comfortable heading in for a treatment right now, I highly recommend taking advantage of their specials and stocking up on a package for post-COVID delight! And if you are comfortable heading in, they have very thought out health protocols in place.<br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p><br /></p>Mariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5656637155142534668.post-73681184072430925592020-10-07T04:11:00.006-07:002020-10-07T04:15:52.279-07:00Fall Cozies<p><span style="font-family: inherit;">Fall is officially upon us, which means sweaters and slippers are making their way back into the rotation these days. Here are some of my favorite items for this time of year! </span></p><p><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></p><p><a href="https://www.barefootdreams.com/women-tops.html" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Barefoot Dreams clothing</span></a></p><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Anything Barefoot Dreams- their fabric is a DREAM</span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.ugg.com/womens-slippers/ansley/1106878.html?dwvar_1106878_color=CHE#start=28&cgid=womens-slippers" target="_blank">UGG Slippers</a><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I've had these for 11 years now and they are still keeping my feet warm and cozy. I love the hard sole, too.</span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><a href="https://www.potterybarn.com/products/cozy-cable-knit-throw/?pkey=cthrows-blankets&isx=0.0.3681" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Cozy Cable Knit Throw</span></a></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I was gifted this over five years ago and it has held up so well. I love the cable on one side and the sherpa feel on the other.</span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><a href="https://www.amazon.com/dp/B01N7DCHGP/?ref=exp_influencer-003e7b16_dp_vv_d" target="_blank"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Lululemon Dupe Define Zip-up</span></a></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I have this in two colors and love it! Perfect for a zip up while working out. Runs small, order up a size.</span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B07QQ2WTHL/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o05_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1" target="_blank">Cozy Sherpa Pullover</a> <br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">This pullover feels like you're wearing a blanket and comes in great basic colors. Runs TTS.</span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B0812BDJFR/ref=ppx_yo_dt_b_asin_title_o03_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1" target="_blank">Pink Cropped Hoodie</a><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">This hoodie is fun because the outside is INSANELY soft and the inside is a brushed cotton fabric. It's cropped so I recommend sizing up. </span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://www.costco.com/eddie-bauer-youth-fleece-jacket%2c-pink.product.100657847.html" target="_blank">Eddie Bauer Jackets for Girls at Costco</a><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">If you're a Costco member, grab these the next time you're there if you have kiddos! High quality and you cannot beat the price. I love shopping Costco for clothing in general- they have really great items!</span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div><div style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Anything you can't live without to stay cozy these days? Comment below! </span></div>Mariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5656637155142534668.post-81238160523391027902020-08-19T14:56:00.002-07:002020-08-19T14:57:35.454-07:00Hi!!!<p> Y'all, it has been forever and a day since I have blogged!! I've turned off social media for a while, which had become my main form of engagement in the digital world. Since that's off the table currently but I find myself missing writing, sharing inspiration, and sparking conversation..... it's back to the blogosphere!</p><p><br /></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8v990GTGxwcinsFpZ2_BYlQSa5W6Dzf0gJsgSUCib8CCMzwd6tJdYkww0Q-B5hBvUgcCN_cx4ZN4RHZYhgf8o-IYayNyi02RG3XlOxuIYPj8fos-Lr-oBhyphenhyphenOyLBLowdJK3sVlyTaVdqlQ/s4032/IMG_7760.HEIC" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="4032" data-original-width="3024" height="410" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8v990GTGxwcinsFpZ2_BYlQSa5W6Dzf0gJsgSUCib8CCMzwd6tJdYkww0Q-B5hBvUgcCN_cx4ZN4RHZYhgf8o-IYayNyi02RG3XlOxuIYPj8fos-Lr-oBhyphenhyphenOyLBLowdJK3sVlyTaVdqlQ/w308-h410/IMG_7760.HEIC" width="308" /></a></div><p><br /></p><p><br /></p><p>My last few archived posts were a mix of happy and sad milestones but you'll notice that as I dip my fingers back in the keyboard on here, it's going to be more lighthearted - mostly things that I would likely share on Instagram (but without the blackhole of screen time that would follow for me!). AND! I get to share articles and videos through the blog! Many of you know that I am article obsessed and perhaps you've even received an article or two from me via email. <3</p><p><br /></p><p>*When they go low, we go high (revisited). You likely know where my vote is going in November, but M.O. speaks to humanity here and not just to a presidential election. She emphasizes what it means to raise an empathetic and compassionate child in a country that doesn't always focus on those values enough. For someone who admits to hating politics, she is as eloquent and convincing as they come. November is right around the corner.</p><p><br /></p><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><iframe allowfullscreen="" class="BLOG_video_class" height="266" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/CX9CONduxJs" width="320" youtube-src-id="CX9CONduxJs"></iframe></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">*Also, kicking it back to a good political laugh in case you need it <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=y8EQFhj8ca4" target="_blank">right now.</a></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">*For parents that love shopping for their kiddos as much as I do, I discovered <a href="https://www.maisonette.com/" target="_blank">Maisonette</a> this summer and there is no turning back. You can thank me later!</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">*A great <a href="https://www.washingtonpost.com/lifestyle/wellness/is-the-glass-half-full-your-age-might-affect-your-optimism-but-the-pandemic-may-not/2020/08/14/ec8d52d4-d290-11ea-8d32-1ebf4e9d8e0d_story.html?utm_campaign=wp_the_optimist&utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter&wpisrc=nl_optimist" target="_blank">article about optimism</a> from The Post's "The Optimist" newsletter, which I highly recommend if you are looking for weekly pick me ups! <a href="https://www.washingtonpost.com/nation/2020/08/17/texas-teenagers-dressed-superheroes-visit-kids-while-collecting-food-donations/?utm_campaign=wp_the_optimist&utm_medium=email&utm_source=newsletter&wpisrc=nl_optimist" target="_blank">This piece</a> had me in tears. Such a great reminder to continue to seek out the helpers - and BE one when you can.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">*Wild Fable's line at Target has some amazing and super affordable <a href="https://www.target.com/p/women-39-s-blue-light-filtering-cateye-plastic-sunglasses-wild-fable-8482-brown/-/A-79725037">blue light filtering glasses</a> for those of us that will be spending most of our days in front of a screen (if you don't already!)</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">*Lastly, for local parents- here are some great resources that I've relied on heavily during the pandemic. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Instagram accounts: @locowithkids - has a ton of family friendly activities and places to visit where it's easy to socially distance. @playgroundsofnova - this is a newer account but it highlights parks in NoVa that check all of the boxes for health, safety, and of course fun right now.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><a href="https://ourkids.com/" target="_blank">Our Kids</a>- this is a great home base for all things local to do with kids and families. It sorts by date, area, etc. and it really compiles it ALL for you in one place.<br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">Signing off with <a href="https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IxXO2ybSvfg" target="_blank">a song</a> that still gets me every. single. time.</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">xo Maria</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">PS. I won't be seeing any comments on FB if you try to link up there, so shoot me an email if you want to keep the conversation going about anything. </div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;"><br /></div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">P.P.S. I just had to go in and update my Blogger profile to edit "twenty something year old" to THIRTY SOMETHING YEAR OLD. Time- please slow down! </div><p></p>Mariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5656637155142534668.post-42698514791754793032018-07-08T14:15:00.001-07:002018-07-08T15:41:05.638-07:0040 In, 40 Out: A Postpartum JourneyYou can do this. <i>You <b>can</b> do this, but why would you? </i>It's a story that needs to be told. <i>Stigmas are stigmas for a reason. </i>So many women suffer in silence. <i>Silence wards off the inevitable judgement</i>. Sharing the experience is cathartic. <i>Sharing the experience is so, so scary.</i> You're on the tail end of it. <i>Will it ever really be over? </i>Mental health is health. <i>Mental health is health.</i><br />
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For the past 80 or so weeks, I haven't been myself. That's a long freaking time when I see those numbers typed out. Yikes. Antepartum and Postpartum depression have hit me like a relentless hurricane during my second pregnancy and life has been difficult at best. It's hard to even know where to begin in sharing my journey, but it's one that's worth sharing if it means that just one other woman in this sometimes lonely world will feel less alone.<br />
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<b>Depression:</b> I think it's important to share a bit of my history with depression as a precursor. Depression runs deep in both sides of my family so it's not totally a surprise that I suffer from it. I remember the first time that I was really able to identify what it was: I came home on break from college during grad school just feeling absolutely miserable and going through the motions, but not much beyond that. It felt as though I was swathed in a deep fog and had no fog light to guide me through the darkness. Since then (or probably before, but I didn't know it), I've battled depression on and off for years.<br />
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<b>Antepartum Depression</b>: Did you know this is a thing? It is a thing. I found out that I was pregnant with Harper in January of 2017. It was something that CP and I were hoping for so we were elated and excited. About a month later after the initial excitement set in, so did the dreaded winter blues. Those winter blues never left, though, and they became spring and summer blues too. I'm not sure how to accurately describe how low I felt. I dragged myself out of bed in the morning, only to find myself pleading for the minutes to tick by faster so I could close my eyes and be done with the day again. I closed so many people off and hibernated whenever I could. Paired with some difficult physical symptoms like sciatica, I hated so much of this pregnancy. The shame that I felt (and still feel) for feeling that way given that so many women and couples struggle with infertility only led me deeper down the depression wormhole.<br />
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Along with the Antepartum depression, this is also when I started experiencing night terrors. I would dream that people were crawling through our walls, children were being taken or were drowning, or that I was trapped in a room with no way out. I would wake up and be "awake", but still in the night terror so I would often be screaming or yelling for help. Oy. These lasted throughout my pregnancy.<br />
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<b>Postpartum Depression:</b> Harper's birth was about as easy as they come and I so hoped for relief from all of the physical and mental ailments that haunted me for the previous 40 weeks. I'd say for about 4-5 months, actually, things were a lot better. When I say a lot better, I mean not as depressing- the transition from one to two girls was still a crazy one, but thankfully (so thankfully!), the night terrors stayed at bay.<br />
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The transition back to work after three months was a stressful one, but I more or less expected that. A couple of months later, my grandfather died, we moved my grandmother to VA, and life threw our family a big curveball. Looking back on those months of going back to work and then a big upheaval within our family, it's no wonder my anxiety and subsequent depression came rearing back, but things were so chaotic in the moment that I couldn't even recognize it.<br />
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My anxiety kept increasing (for me, I mostly feel a big 'ol pit in stomach when I'm anxious) and there was another piece that started making my depression rear its ugly head more and more: pumping. Where to even start on this one- it is such a love/hate relationship that I have with the darn machine. I'm thankful that I had one and that I was able to use it. Beyond that, though, it became such a source of the blues for me. Harper surprisingly preferred the bottle to milk from the source, so I was spending about 100-150 minutes a day tethered to the pump and after long enough, it just got the best of me. At work I would miss recess and planning time, meaning I wouldn't step outside of the building most days and I was obviously playing catch up on planning all the time. I would wake up at 5am to give myself enough time to pump and get myself out the door for work and then I would be dead tired at night....only to remember that I still had to pump last thing before bed. All this to say- pumping wore me to the ground this time around. Around this time, my night terrors also resurfaced and they were far worse this time.<br />
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So- what was the breaking point? I started to resent Harper. Even typing those words and rereading them makes the tears stream down my face, but it's an honest moment of where I was at and it's also when I realized that I needed help as soon as possible. This was all totally new, as I had not experienced any of this with Avery's pregnancy or postpartum journey. Again, depression is beyond difficult to describe if you're not prone to it but the best way I can bring my feelings to life is to explain that Harper is one of the happiest babies I've ever met. Not just because she's ours, but because she truly just radiates happiness. That's a wonderful thing, right? To me, in that moment, it was the worst thing. I had spent 40 mostly blue weeks carrying this baby and now she was the most even keel and delightful cherub....and here I was blue. Again. It was as if Harper had managed to soak up every atom of happiness from me and transplant it into her DNA, leaving me with nothing.<br />
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When I went to my doctor, we came up with a plan and I think I'll share more of that plan and the resources and strategies that I have found incredibly helpful in another post. Things are definitely moving in the right direction, thankfully, and I do feel like I'm in a much better place than 8-10 weeks ago. That being said, so much of mental health is an ongoing conversation and evaluation - one that is imperative to keep on your front burner, even when you have a million other things vying for your stove top space in life.<br />
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When I think about why I felt compelled to write about and share my experience, it's three-fold. Writing has always been cathartic for me in general. Also, once I started opening up to friends, it became so clear so very quickly that many women suffer from anxiety and depression (many of whom are postpartum), and I gained so much strength and courage from listening to their stories and experiences. And finally, I'm sharing my experience for Avery and Harper. Never, ever, ever do I want them to feel as though they are "other" if and when they are feeling blue. It's a difficult thing knowing that depression runs in families and there's a solid chance that one or both of them may experience it. However, my hope is that the mental health conversation picks up as much speed as the other parts of our health-centered conversations have so that they know they're never alone and that it is normal and okay to not feel normal and to not feel okay. I want them to know that they have parents, family, and friends that will always be there for them and support them regardless of any mental, physical, or emotional circumstances that they are experiencing. This is a great big world and it can be a scary one if you feel like you're traversing it alone.<br />
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And so, here we are. Mostly on the other side of Antepartum and Postpartum depression, mostly feeling normal (whatever normal even means), and so grateful for a lot of love and a lot of support that I've felt on this challenging journey. I do want to share what helped most over the last year and a half next time, but for now just know that if you are a human being and you are struggling, there is someone out there with their arms wide open ready to catch you.<i> It's okay to fall as long as you know where you can land safely.</i><br />
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<br />Mariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5656637155142534668.post-32787953209342271182018-05-28T04:12:00.005-07:002018-05-28T04:25:48.532-07:00Avery is Three!Actually, she's been three for nearly two months now. I haven't blogged in forever (hoping to change that soon!), but this space as served as her baby book in many ways, so here are some tidbits about what life is like at three for Aves.<br />
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-The emotions. Ohhhh, the emotions. There's a reason they're affectionately known as threenagers at this stage. Every feeling is SO big. Happy, angry, silly, sad, you name it and the feelings are so strong. As a parent this can be a roller coaster but it's also incredible when you get to see such excitement through a little's eyes. For example, the other night CP was showing Avery a lightning bug and the squeal that she let out when it lit up is a timeless memory.</div>
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-Avery has always been off the charts in height and weight and has shown no signs of slowing down! People are often shocked when they find out that she is only three because she's the size of a five year old. She definitely has the Pike height in her blood. Seeing Aves in the midst of her classmates is always fun and also a little comical since she towers above almost ALL of them and when I brought her in to school one day this Spring, she fit riiiiight in. :) </div>
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-Reserved is still one of the first words that comes to mind when I think about Avery but she is coming out of her shell bit by bit. It still takes quite a while for Avery to warm up to strangers but once she's warmed up, there is no stopping her. This is definitely one of the biggest ways that she has changed in the last year.</div>
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-Some of you will remember that Avery's speech was slow to take off this time last year. Well, enter preschool (Hi, Jane!!) and wow. Just wow. Putting Aves in a two year old class this year is the best decision that we have made in so many ways and her speech development is one of them. Her vocabulary growth has been remarkable and there's no doubt that her continued socialization in the preschool setting has been a huge contributor.</div>
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-The one liners and conversations at this age are just too much. Two examples:</div>
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Avery, while driving with me down Kirby Road: "MOMMY. You are going WAY too fast. This is dangerous!!!" (I was, in fact, not speeding at all- perhaps it was the windy road?).</div>
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While CP and I were out and Ma (aka my mom) was with Aves. Avery to her walkie- talkie: "Hello? Mommy, Daddy? You there? How are you? You having any problems? We are alllll good over here." </div>
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-Being a big sister to Harper is a role that Avery takes very seriously. I know that I can't always expect Avery and Harper to have a bond sealed with a kiss, but the love and affection that they show for one another right now is just so, so sweet. Avery loves to make Harper laugh and show her new things and Harper clearly looks up to Aves already as a big sister. These two have so much fun in store for them over the years.</div>
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-I'm so excited to see what the next year brings for Avery. Her serious, silly, shy, and loving personality is truly a gift and being her mama is the most rewarding (aaaand scariest!) job in the world. </div>
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(photo by Laura Lou Photography!)</div>
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Mariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5656637155142534668.post-55053846336455687222017-12-30T10:19:00.000-08:002017-12-30T10:19:54.761-08:00Year FourDaddio,<br />
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As we approach year four of you not being here, I'm feeling more reflective than in years past. Time has a way of doing that, no? My mind bends and swirls when I think about how much has occurred in the past three years - so much happiness, inevitable worry and sorrow, fear, and also celebration. It's natural and easy to fall down the trap of wishing you were here to spend time with these two beautiful and budding granddaughters of yours. I see you chasing Avery down the sidewalk on her balance bike and taking her and Harper to The Italian Store to visit your friends. Alas, these are just fleeting and impossible fantasies.<br />
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That being said, I'm realizing how much of you lives on in me and therefore in them. How much my words and actions will mold these little malleable minds much like your words and actions molded my own. I so often see you in myself in my everyday life- both for better and for worse! Even those for worse moments have a silver lining in that I pause to reflect on what I can be doing differently. All this to say : you're not here but my goodness you are. Each year that you've been gone has taught me something new about myself because you've always been (and will always continue to be) my voice of reason.<br />
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<b>Year One: The Circle of Life</b><br />
As we turned the page of you being gone for a year, I watched the sun rise and set that day on the beach in Florida with a baby growing inside of me. In that moment, the circle of life was staring me down- the notion of missing one life so much and also being so excited for the life that was going to join us soon. I realized that the yearning for what was and the excitement of what is to be are not mutually exclusive. Although that felt unfamiliar, that has been such a valuable life lesson. Beauty, fear, truth, sadness- they don't have to stand on their own.<br />
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<b>Year Two: Patience</b><br />
Admittedly, this is a theme that I honed in on during year two in spite of you- patience was never a strong suit between us, now was it? :) Motherhood forced me to learn patience on so many levels. Most importantly, I learned how to be patient with myself. There were (are!) simply not enough hours in the day to plow through those long to-do lists that I often found pride in completing. Even when there is the time, I'd much rather spend those fleeting moments doing something more meaningful than folding a basket of laundry. Those baskets? They sit there. Those ungraded papers? They sit, too. That cluttered trunk of my car? It gets even more cluttered if it means that my mind can rest for a few minutes. Everything will get done and it doesn't have to get done right away. Patience, patience, patience.<br />
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<b>Year Three: Human Connection</b><br />
This is a trait of yours that I've always admired beyond belief. You had a way of connecting with people that left me in awe, particularly when it was an unexpected relationship. From the janitors at the gyms on the weekends who became your best buds to Jack, the gentleman with an intellectual disability who you mentored while I was growing up, you consistently went out of your way to form new and meaningful relationships. Seeing you in these roles taught me what this life is all about - connection. As I settled into a new position at a new school during year three, I honed in on this idea even more. I formed some amazing relationships at CB over eight years that I've held onto and I've also put myself out there with new co-workers and have found a lot of comfort and support in those new relationships. Whenever I think of you, it's the reminder that I need knowing that the smallest words and actions carry the greatest gifts and weight.<br />
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And so, here's to year four and all that it will teach me. We'll be remembering you on the 2nd with Five Guys and Manhattans- just the way you would like it.<br />
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<br />Mariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5656637155142534668.post-75831046441016815792017-01-19T12:48:00.000-08:002017-01-19T12:48:03.877-08:00A Mother's Intuition <div style="color: #3d596d; font-family: Merriweather, Georgia, "Times New Roman", Times, serif; font-size: 15px; margin-bottom: 24px;">
Since Avery was little, she's always been on the late to very late end of milestones. Pinching her food, crawling, walking- you name it. The girl has a mind of her own and certainly doesn't rush into things. She also has a stubborn streak in her....no idea where she got that from! :) Perhaps it was my own mom telling me that I was the same way with being on the later end of timelines, but I always felt throughout the late milestones that it was fine and she'd get there when she was ready (as difficult as it was not to compare her to other kids her age). From day one, my motherhood mantra has always been that a healthy and happy baby = success.</div>
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Fast forward to Avery at nearly 21 months, and we're living that mantra day in and day out. Aves is a healthy and happy girl who loves to take in the world around her. Like any toddler she has her moments that make you cringe (especially when they are in public!), but we all know that this is part of growing up. As we reach the age where Avery is supposed to be developing her speech at a faster and faster rate and identifying everyday objects around her, something has felt a bit off. Receptively, girl's got it down and she loves following directions that you give her- especially when it comes to giving our dog Sloan a hug and a kiss. However, there are parts of her expressive language that have left us wondering. Wondering if this is another stage of Aves being a late bloomer or wondering if perhaps we need to dig a bit deeper on this one.</div>
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As a teacher, I'm more than accustomed to teaching children of all backgrounds. Students that come from all over the world, students that come from modern families, students that have special needs, students that are so bright beyond their years- and I love them all the same. I think having this maternal instinct with all of the students that I've taught over the years has reinforced for me that even if Avery does require services or additional help, there's nothing "wrong" with her. That being said, that word- "wrong"- has come up time and time again when I've mentioned my observation about Avery to other people and it's made me pause and reflect. It's something that I feel like I want to be able to bring up in conversation and not necessarily hide, but it's also been an eye-opening experience sharing this concern with others. I know in my heart that there is nothing wrong with a child (or adult, for that matter) that needs help of any kind. Might they need some additional services to get them where they need to be, though? Absolutely. The thing is, I know that people who have said, "Oh, I'm sure there's nothing wrong with her!" have meant so, so well by that comment. And they're right- there is nothing wrong with Avery. There<em> is</em> something that has been pulling on my mama heartstrings that I want to look into further, though. There <em>is</em> something that we can do proactively as her parents to let her know that we're always her number one advocates and want to do whatever we can to be there for her. </div>
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And so- we made the call. The testing hasn't taken place yet and I don't think that this is the space for me to share where we go from here either way. It is a space, though, to share that as a parent you're always the most in tune with your child(ren) and you're always their front-line of love and guidance for them. As a parent, don't ever feel like something is wrong with your little one when you're noticing something that seems different (something that I've been reminding myself a lot these days).<br />
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Healthy and Happy = Success.</div>
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Sidenote: I actually caught myself doing a similar thing the other day when a friend was sharing that she was worried about something medically and I made a comment along the lines of, "Oh, I'm sure it's nothing!". I don't think that's what she wanted or needed to hear, though. Instead, I think a more comforting response would have been that I hope that it turns out to be nothing, but if it is something, I'm here for her in whatever way she needs me. It's easy for us to think that we're consoling people by hoping that there's nothing abnormal happening in their lives when, in fact, sometimes we just need to hear that even if there is something unusual that pops up, we have friends in our corner waiting to be there for us. </div>
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"Chopsticks, you say!?"</div>
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Mariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5656637155142534668.post-9969997254880638342016-11-04T12:11:00.001-07:002016-11-04T12:12:35.587-07:00Screaming From The Soapbox<div class="MsoNormal">
Friends and Readers,</div>
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This is personal. <o:p></o:p></div>
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It’s important to start off by making it very clear that in
no way am I bashing the two schools that I have worked at for the past eight
years. Quite the opposite, in fact. I love both of them <u>dearly</u>. That being said,
they are becoming products of a broken system, as are the rest of the Fairfax
County schools.<o:p></o:p></div>
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This Tuesday, Fairfax County voters will vote on the
proposed meals tax for the county. To most voters, this might seem like an
obvious vote- of course I don’t want to pay a tax on my meals. However, to
anyone who is connected to education in Fairfax County, we know that this is a VERY
important tax that we need to pass on Tuesday.<o:p></o:p></div>
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As a product of FCPS schools, I have a lot of pride and
admiration for this school system. It has changed, though- and not for
the better. When I was in high school at McLean High School, FCPS was often compared to the crème de
la crème Texas school systems that are recognized across the country. When I
was getting my degree in Elementary Education, I knew to apply to teach in FCPS
very early on because you had to be invited to an exclusive early hire fair if
you wanted <i>any</i> hope of getting a
teaching job for the following school year. Fast forward eight years and the portrait of
FCPS is much different now. We currently have over 200 vacancies in the county
and they are begging people to attend the FCPS job fairs each spring. Every single
year has brought new and difficult challenges from the top down. Until last
year, teachers did not receive a step increase for seven years (!!!!!). In
fact, even with our raise for the first time in so many years, when we crunched
the math with our new insurance premiums it came out to a whopping TWENTY TWO
DOLLARS more per month that we were making. Teachers are exhausted-
mentally, physically, and financially. It is demeaning and hurtful to feel as though we are
not valued in a job that we commit so many hours of our day to- both inside AND
outside of our schools. <o:p></o:p></div>
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On top of teachers not being compensated appropriately, we’re
failing in other areas too. Our retired teachers who substitute teach are now
being paid the same amount of money as a normal substitute teacher, which is
insane. Our classroom technology is lacking. Our class sizes are far too large.
Our morale is down. Teachers are jumping ship left and right to head to nearby
counties that compensate their teachers appropriately. The list goes on and on…..<o:p></o:p></div>
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I think what hurts the most is knowing the average portrait
of the voter that’s going to potentially shoot this tax down- someone who lives in one of
the <b>wealthiest </b>areas of the United
States and can certainly afford a meal tax and yet does not support our
children and teachers. Never mind, either, that every single surrounding county
already has a meal tax in place that allows their school systems to continue
thriving.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Maybe you’ve already heard about the meal tax and have made
up your mind or maybe you haven’t. If nothing else, please educate yourself on
this vote. For this teacher, it’s deeply personal. Your vote for the meals tax
is a vote for our county’s children, our teachers, and our future. I fear that
the fallout from a potential strike down of the this tax will simply spur yet another exodus of amazing educators to other close-by counties- an exodus that
FCPS simply cannot afford. Pun intended.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Educate yourself:</div>
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<a href="http://www.fairfaxcounty.gov/mealstax/" target="_blank">http://www.fairfaxcounty.gov/mealstax/</a></div>
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<a href="https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/on-the-menu-more-revenue-for-fairfax/2016/09/24/8798795c-80fb-11e6-8327-f141a7beb626_story.html" target="_blank">https://www.washingtonpost.com/opinions/on-the-menu-more-revenue-for-fairfax/2016/09/24/8798795c-80fb-11e6-8327-f141a7beb626_story.html</a></div>
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<a href="http://www.yesmealstax.org/more-mythbusters" target="_blank">Meals Tax Mythbusters</a></div>
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<a href="http://www.insidenova.com/opinion/letters_to_editor/letter-meals-tax-a-small-price-to-pay-for-what/article_a264bdd2-9b80-11e6-bd58-6f6a16655c5a.html" target="_blank">http://www.insidenova.com/opinion/letters_to_editor/letter-meals-tax-a-small-price-to-pay-for-what/article_a264bdd2-9b80-11e6-bd58-6f6a16655c5a.html</a></div>
Mariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5656637155142534668.post-69785467110820302732016-10-06T18:30:00.000-07:002016-10-06T18:54:29.411-07:00Grieving with Gratitude <div class="MsoNormal">
True to form, grief comes in waves and is unpredictable. It
has been nearly three years since my dad passed and there are still hours,
days, and weeks that sneak up on me and are particularly weepy and difficult.
This past week has been one of those stretches of time that’s rooted in the
fact that I just miss my dad. <o:p></o:p></div>
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Last week Avery was having a particularly turbulent
afternoon where nothing seemed to be appeasing her when we got home. Finally, I
decided to lay down with her in our bedroom knowing that snuggle time if often
her favorite activity after a long day. We’ve gone through this routine on many
days yet this day was unique. As Avery rolled over into her snuggle spot that
was close enough to me but not toooo close (#toddlerboundaries), Sloan hopped
up to join us. The next few minutes that transpired are scary and yet somehow comforting.<o:p></o:p></div>
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Avery stopped crying and locked eyes with me as Sloan sat there with us. In that moment, a flood of emotion swept over me as I felt my
dad more present than ever. The circle of life was staring me down as Avery
snuggled so peacefully in the same space that my dad took his last
breath. While I know a large part of my brain chemistry doesn’t allow me to
recall a lot of the events on January 2<sup>nd</sup>, 2014 (hello, survival
mode), the vision of my dad lying so peacefully when I found him that afternoon
was staring right at me. It’s no surprise that it’s painful not having my dad living
as Avery grows up, but there’s also no question that he makes his presence
known in our lives.<br />
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The four of us spent the next few minutes together, our
souls swathed together in a comforting space. It was the first
time that my dad has showed up for me in Avery’s presence and as the tears streamed
down my face, Aves calmly stared back at me knowing full well that the moment
was a special one.<o:p></o:p></div>
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I’ve spent a lot of time with this moment in my mind over
the past week. These types of situations take a lot of time for me to process
and move through and I think they’re important to share. I have a co-worker
this year that I’ve quickly become close with. Her energy is infectious and her
warmth shines through so strongly each day that I see her. We connected on
Facebook and I’ve learned through some her posts that she lost one of her
beautiful daughters in a tragic accident a few years ago. My heart breaks and
bursts with happiness every time that I read her loving words about her
daughter because it’s so clear that they are another example of the living
existing in a special place alongside those who have left us. <o:p></o:p></div>
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The other night she posted something that spoke to me so
clearly and powerfully:<o:p></o:p></div>
<img alt="Image result for death is nothing at all. it does not count" src="https://s-media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/564x/03/8e/5b/038e5be93440223eefc7cbe655dd0702.jpg" /><br />
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Daddio, I want you to know that we love you beyond measure
and feel your presence. You’re a source of comfort and strength each day and I
hope in some small way that we are for you, too. I carry your heart with me (I
carry it in my heart). <o:p></o:p></div>
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Mariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5656637155142534668.post-79434419690386553252016-09-16T05:14:00.000-07:002016-09-16T05:14:18.878-07:00The Truth Is.....On Sunday my mom and I took Avery to the Nats game where CP would later join us. Avery and I haven't been to a Nats baseball game in over a month and she's at the age where she's changing so rapidly that she's not the same little chickpea that she was just 30 days ago. Flashback to last <b>year </b>when she would literally sleep through the entire game. Those days are LONG gone.<br />
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After enjoying a small bucket of french fries all to herself (#yolo), Aves quickly became antsy. It was clear that trying to stay in our seats was not a realistic expectation so I took her up to the concessions area above our seats where we ended up staying for over an hour. In all honesty, despite missing most of the baseball game itself, that hour was so darn fun! Avery had a blast running into the crowds of people passing by and wiggling her way back to me, many people stopped to say hello to her, and we even got to hear the bagpipers tune up for their 7th inning stretch performance.<br />
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The reason I popped in to even share this is because I had posted some photos on social media that showed Avery sitting in a seat happily munching on those delicious fries and while she certainly did enjoy them, that photo did not accurately represent our experience that afternoon! I find that this is one of the most obvious blessings and curses of social media in general- our lives are so curated. While I know this, I think it's an important reminder to bring to light sometimes, too.<br />
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The Nats game was a great time, but not because of the baseball. It was fun because I had the opportunity to soak up some unintended moments of Avery's childhood that were incredibly special to me. In a schedule that keeps us moving non-stop, it was especially meaningful to me that we were able to veer off course and be extra silly and spontaneous together.<br />
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<br />Mariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5656637155142534668.post-9470183261614918892016-08-30T16:50:00.002-07:002016-08-30T16:51:15.623-07:00Sympathy and Empathy I imagine that some of you have heard of or are familiar with <a href="http://brenebrown.com/" target="_blank">Brene Brown</a>. If you're not, might I suggest that you put her on your radar? Brene is the type of writer and speaker that gets under your skin in the best possible way and makes you want to be a better person. She embraces the flaws that we all posses and sees past them.<br />
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I was so, so delighted when my principal, Holly, shared the video below with our staff. While it might seem a bit disjointed to be showing the clip to an elementary school staff, it was a means through which we discussed our Putting Kindness First mission for the year. Every single person in the building- students, teachers, administrators, custodians, office staff- comes to school with a suitcase full of "stuff". Perhaps we only see the carry-on items in our building, but that suitcase is chock-full of other items that we are not privy to. Therefore, rather than jumping to conclusions and closing off relationships, sometimes a kind listening ear can forge a relationship that might not otherwise blossom.<br />
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That being said, when people share difficult things that are happening in their lives, there's an often inherent desire to start "silver-lining" the situation (a made-up verb that Brene embraces). Often this starts with, "At least......". When we do this, we are driving a disconnect between two people and the situation at hand. What's strange is that I found MYSELF saying this to others when my own father passed away out of the blue. "At least he didn't suffer....." was a phrase that seemed to be on auto-tune after some time. I can acknowledge to myself that this was 110% a survival mode tactic in those moments when I could not look myself in the mirror and say that my dad was here and then he was not. I continue to cut myself a lot of slack on this because, hello, grief very much includes survival mode at times, but I've been extremely cautious in using this phrase with others.<br />
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There are many moments in life when we are truly at a loss for words. Someone shares something with you that is so personal and so beyond our comprehension in the moment that you literally cannot form words to come out of your mouth. Often, that results in words spewing out that probably should not. Instead, think about taking a moment to look that person in the eye and say, "I'm truly at a loss for words.....I hope that I can be here for you in a way that you need me......I know it took a lot of strength and bravery to share this with me....I'm holding you close in my heart." The truth is, those "At least...." phrases and those "You'll get past this" phrases minimize the gravity of a person's feelings and, frankly, it is harmful to all of those involved in the conversation.<br />
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Empathy fuels connection, sympathy drives disconnection.<br />
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I'll never forget the day that I went back to school after my dad died. As part of that survival mode that I spoke about earlier, I clung so, so hard to what I knew and arrived at school on a Monday after my dad had passed on Thursday unsure of what to expect, but knowing that it was where I needed to be. Naturally, there were a lot of sympathetic and empathetic conversations that day. One does stick out in particular, though, and it's when my co-worker Julie came into my room, hugged me, and just started crying. She didn't know what to say and she didn't have to say anything at all for me to feel her empathy and connection in that moment. She probably knew that nothing she could say would make the situation better and that sometimes you just need to cry it out with another human being. I'm forever grateful for that moment, Julie!<br />
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Empathy and sympathy are something that I still struggle with to this day and I imagine that a lot of us feel this way. It's very natural to want to "fix" a situation or make it seem "better" than it is. However, I truly believe in the power of human connection and oftentimes empathy is all someone needs to feel and fuel that connection.<br />
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<br />Mariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5656637155142534668.post-34027542668409593592016-08-26T18:58:00.004-07:002016-08-27T03:50:43.802-07:00Summer 2016<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">This summer has been transformative. Unlike many other summers when I felt as though I blinked and I was back in the classroom, the last eight weeks I've felt so....present. Intentional. Deliberate. Filled with gratitude.</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">If you remember, the beginning of summer brought some beautiful unrest as I discovered what spending all day with a 16 month old looked like. Avery and I spent many memorable days with one another and it's time that I will forever cherish. During that time, my co-worker and I successful ran another year of our homegrown math camp- a project that we are both immensely proud of. There's something about seeing your students in the summer and outside of the classroom that's always fun and enlightening. </span><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">Avery and I took a trip to New York on the train, we visited special people that live close by, family and friends were able to visit us at our new(ish) home, and CP and I were fortunate enough to go on a plethora of dates thanks to some amazing babysitters. I also started a new venture, @mpikefitness, that continues to feel intimidating and uncharted but my passion is steering this ship and it has been a fun and exciting undertaking.</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">On top of all of these wonderful moments, I'd be remiss if I didn't also acknowledge that I've felt a change in my core. Not in my abdominal core, but the core of my soul. Frankly, this has taken me by surprise and it has taken a lot of patience and trust for me to acknowledge this. I'm really not quite sure how to even describe what I'm talking about and I worry that attempting to will be a potential disservice to myself (and perhaps even to you as a reader). On a very basic level, though, I've felt connected to people, places, and things in ways that I have not in the past. I'm gaining an appreciation for things that I once either didn't notice or chose not to. I'm putting new feelings under a microscope rather than shoving them out the door. I imagine that this sounds like a spiritual journey. Perhaps it is? I'm really not quite sure. </span><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">I guess what I'm trying to get across is that I've always tried to be honest in this space. I've shared my favorite toddler products and I've shared how my grief still haunts me from time to time. I live in a space of this Earth that is fascinating. There is a lot of love in this area, but there is a hustle and bustle that can present itself as gruff and unwilling to explore new possibilities. I already feel this as the seemingly natural chaos of a new school year begins. Pacing guides to be printed and combed through, papers to be graded, meetings to be attended, meals to be made, many emails to be replied to. What I love (!) about teaching, though, is the experience of seeing the world through a child's bright eyes. Those eyes as well as the eyes of my own offspring will continue to guide me on this new experience, no doubt, despite the demands of the job. I want to continue being open and honest with myself as this unknown territory becomes more charted. I want to give pause when pause is needed. More than anything, I want to continue being grateful for this life, for the opportunities to fall and to get back up, and for the chance to fill this Earth with love.</span><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><br style="background-color: white; color: #222222;" /><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">Xoxo M</span></span><br />
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A perfectly imperfect photo of one of my favorite moments from this summer: watching the sunrise on the beach.</div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">My favorite, favorite Natalie Merchant song that encapsulates this stage of my life pretty darn well. Can we also give pause for the beauty of this music video? </span></span></div>
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<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><br /></span></span>Mariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5656637155142534668.post-40113722216561526652016-08-19T07:40:00.000-07:002016-08-19T07:44:00.259-07:00Favorite Toddler Products (16 months)Hey there! I wanted to share some of our favorite toddler items that we've been getting a lot of use out of this summer. Keep in mind, with the larger ticket item (such as our strollers), we did not try other ones so I don't have a gauge of how they compare to others. Update: I rented a BOB this week at the beach and love it!<br />
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<a href="https://www.amazon.com/UPPAbaby-2015-Vista-Stroller-Taylor/dp/B013CTH8NC/ref=sr_1_3_s_it?s=baby-products&ie=UTF8&qid=1470748237&sr=1-3&keywords=uppababy+vista" target="_blank">Uppababy Vista Stroller</a>- Leave it to my mom who found one of these on super clearance at Bed Bath and Beyond of all places! It was a previous year's model on sale and she was also able to use their infamous 20% coupon on it so we got a killer deal on this stroller. I will say that the design is so sleek and I love it. It does really well on different terrains (it's not meant as a jogging or trail stroller, though) and my only quip with it is that it's heavy! It does fold up and stand quite easily, but you definitely need both hands to lift it into the car or the house.<br />
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<a href="https://www.amazon.com/UPPAbaby-2015-G-Lite-Stroller-Jake/dp/B00NF9KKLC/ref=sr_1_1_s_it?s=baby-products&ie=UTF8&qid=1470748405&sr=1-1&keywords=uppababy+glite" target="_blank">Uppababy GLite stroller</a>- I know what some of you are saying- two strollers?! However, those who have an umbrella stroller will probably attest to the power of them! They are SO light and easy to get around with. We mostly keep ours in the car so we can use it for going to the park, the mall, and other errands that we don't want to lug the Vista around for. It's NOT great on any non-flat surfaces, but it's not meant to be used on those. The only hold up that I have with the GLite is that despite many adjustments with the straps, Avery still tends so slouch a lot in it. Is this normal for umbrella strollers? On the upside, it has a strap so you can carry it over your shoulder when it's folded up, which is a great feature.<br />
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<a href="http://www.target.com/p/honest-company-bubble-bath-sweet-orange-vanilla-12oz/-/A-15417323" target="_blank">Orange Vanilla bubble bath</a>- I definitely throw this in my own baths, too! The scent is divine and it leaves Avery's skin feeling super soft and fragrant.<br />
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<a href="https://www.amazon.com/Munchkin-Miracle-Sippy-Green-Ounce/dp/B00MRZIGVG" target="_blank">360 Cups</a>- Somehow we completed avoided the milk in a bottle phase when I stopped feeding Avery and transitioned straight to sippy cups and 360 cups. These are wonderful and really get toddlers on track to sip from a normal cup on their own. The only downside is that when they throw it, the water splashes onto the floor quite a bit.<br />
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<a href="http://www.potterybarnkids.com/products/lavender-anywhere-chair-2013/?pkey=danywhere-chairs&&danywhere-chairs" target="_blank">PB Kids Anywhere Chair </a>- This was a birthday present for Avery and I honestly wasn't sure how much use it would get even though it is beyond adorable. Well, I can safely say that it gets a TON of use in our house! Avery looooves sitting in "her" chair and can often be found sitting there with her milk just "reading" away. It's great that she has her own little nook to read and watch TV from (Eeks! Did I just admit that I let my kid watch some T.V.?! Ha!).<br />
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<a href="https://www.amazon.com/Babyganics-Mineral-Based-Sunscreen-Spray-Bottle/dp/B00V9D7O1U" target="_blank">Babyganics Spray Sunscreen</a>- I LOVE this sunscreen because it's white so you can see where it goes on but it's not like zinc oxide where it stays white on the skin. It does smell a little strange, but I'll take a bit of a smell over a bad sunburn any day. I've actually been using it on myself this summer, too.<br />
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<a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B01EUA0HEO/ref=s9_acsd_hps_bw_c_x_1" target="_blank">Swim Diaper</a>- This has been a great addition to our beach bag this summer! At our pool, you need to have another pair of swim pants on top of a swim diaper, so I've mainly been using a rashguard top and then this bottom over a swim diaper. I like that it's adjustable with the snaps since Avery's ham hocks continue to grow by the minute....<br />
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<a href="http://www.lego.com/en-us/duplo/products/my-first-garden-10819" target="_blank">LEGO Duplos</a>- I'm not sure who has more fun with these, Avery or CP, but they are a big hit in our house. The only hiccup is that unlike most of Avery's other toys, I have to put these away daily unless we want to be yelping in pain in the middle of the night. :)<br />
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<a href="http://freshlypicked.com/" target="_blank">Freshly Picked moccs</a>- These continue to be our favorite shoes. Avery is on her third pair and they are the only ones that she cannot get off- and they're adorable! I try to get neutral colors that will go with a lot of outfits, but their designs are so, so cute and I might spring for a fun print someday soon.<br />
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<a href="https://www.amazon.com/Pampers-Baby-Diapers-Giant-Count/dp/B00DDMIODM/ref=sr_1_2_s_it?s=baby-products&ie=UTF8&qid=1471617441&sr=1-2&keywords=pampers+babydry" target="_blank">Pamper's Baby Dry diapers</a>- These quickly became a necessity when Avery was leaking out of her diapers nearly every night. Now that we seem to be through the big teething phase (minus those last molars!), potty training seems to be the next big hurdle in a few months. I'm sure I'll have an all call for advice on that sometime soon!!<br />
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There you have it- many of our favorites these days. I'm sure I've forgotten a few and I'd also love to hear any toddler favorites of your own!<br />
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<br />Mariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5656637155142534668.post-71721198370149380512016-08-11T06:09:00.000-07:002016-08-11T06:09:05.070-07:00The Fear of FailureAs a lot of you know, this fall I will be a veteran newbie at a different elementary school. The change brings up a lot of emotion- excitement, fear, nervousness, the longing for my friends that became family at Chesterbrook, etc.. Honestly, one of the things that makes me least nervous is the actual curriculum. Even though I'm switching back to 4th grade from six years in 6th grade, I know that the curriculum is manageable if I put forth the proper effort. The part that keeps me up at night the most with the change, though, is the new building of relationships - with students, with families, and with co-workers.<br />
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Recently, my new principal sent out our first staff update for the school year. In addition to keeping up with the school-wide initiative of #kgpride (used whenever we're proud of something at Kent Gardens), she also shared a school-wide mantra that we're going to incorporate at every level of the school this year: <b>Putting Kindness First</b>. You all can imagine the feeling that I experienced when I read this......my heart practically leaped out of my chest with happiness! You only have to take one look at the name of my blog to realize that the learning of facts will always come <i>after</i> we establish a classroom culture of being nice and working hard. While there is a very natural nervous feeling that will no doubt linger for these first couple of weeks of school, I'm also feeling an immense sense of excitement knowing that our school is on such a wonderful mission together of putting kindness first.<br />
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Yesterday I was at an all-day in-service. While it was a long day, it was one of those experiences that you walk out of feeling so motivated and ready to jump into the school year. The speakers were truly amazing and reinvigorated my energy and love of learning as well as teaching. At one of the breakout sessions, we were asked to recall a time that a teacher put us down as a student. I didn't even have to think about it for more than a second because the experience still lingers so close to my heart. It was my 11th grade English class with Mr. Munaker. Munaker never had a very gentle disposition and unless you loved UofMD sports, there wasn't much to connect with him about. At one point in the year we wrote a paper about Huckleberry Finn and when I got mine back, I was humiliated. In large letters on every single page (in red pen, no less) he had written, "WHAT?". Of course, on the front page there was a C or a D also glaring me at me. While Mr. Munaker was a perfectly fine person, this teaching technique was so, so hurtful. There was no offer of help, no offer of re-writing the paper, no guidance on how to become a better writer overall. Just the "WHAT?" that is forever ingrained in my mind. As hurtful as the experience was, I knew that I was not defined by a single paper, a single teacher, or a single experience in a class. I went on to be an English major at UVA, where I had professors who guided and nurtured me in the way that every student deserves to be looked after. I remember each of them so vividly and am forever grateful for my experiences in their classes. I'll never, ever forget the time during my first year when I wrote an essay on Wordsworth's 'I Wandered Lonely as a Cloud' and sent it to my dad. I was sitting in my dorm room when I read his reply that was just beaming with happiness and pride. Was it the best essay I would come to write? Of course not, but both of us knew that it was a truly pivotal moment for me in more than one way.<br />
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Finally, I want to share an article that I read this morning: <a href="http://www.theatlantic.com/education/archive/2015/08/when-success-leads-to-failure/400925/" target="_blank">When Success Leads to Failure</a>. I HIGHLY recommend taking the time to read the piece and I'm most definitely ordering Lahey's book. Here are some passages that stuck out to me:<br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Lyon Text", Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 18px; line-height: 30.0001px;">"Marianna’s parents, her teachers, society at large—we are all implicated in this crime against learning. From her first day of school, we pointed her toward that altar and trained her to measure her progress by means of points, scores, and awards. We taught Marianna that her potential is tied to her intellect, and that her intellect is more important than her character. We taught her to come home proudly bearing As, championship trophies, and college acceptances, and we inadvertently taught her that we don’t really care how she obtains them. We taught her to protect her academic and extracurricular perfection at all costs and that it’s better to quit when things get challenging rather than risk marring that perfect record. Above all else, we taught her to fear failure. That fear is what has destroyed her love of learning."</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Lyon Text", Georgia, Times, serif; font-size: 18px; line-height: 30.0001px;">"I know this mom because she’s just like me. And telling her the truth is hard both because I’m afraid she’ll get defensive and angry, and because it means I have to cop to all the same mistakes in my own parenting. Maybe it’s time to share some truths with her as I figure out where I went astray, and together we can help our kids rediscover their intellectual bravery, their enthusiasm for learning, and the resilience they need in order to grow into independent, competent adults. With a little luck, they will look back on their childhood and thank us; not just for our unwavering love, but for our willingness to put their long-term developmental and emotional needs before their short-term happiness. For our willingness to let their lives be just a little bit harder today so they will know how to face hardship tomorrow."</span><br />
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While the experience in Mr. Munaker's English 11 class was a tough one and certainly one that I don't want to repeat for any of my own students, my failures in that class did light a fire within me. I think failure can come with a lot less detriment than my own experience in that class (one of many experiences in failure for me!), but it <b>is</b> truly an imperative part of growing up and becoming a life-long learner.<br />
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To my incoming fourth graders, I cannot wait to meet you! We're going to have an incredible year, during which we put kindness first and learn some amazing lessons- both academic and life lessons- along the way. #kgpride<br />
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<br />Mariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5656637155142534668.post-50540391338999205442016-08-01T07:24:00.000-07:002016-08-01T07:26:06.372-07:00Product ReviewsHere are some products that I'm LOVING this summer! None of these are sponsored or affiliate links, but maybe I should start that based on how many people have purchased the face serum after I posted it on Instagram (it's listed below, too)! Here they are:<br />
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<a href="https://www.amazon.com/Schmidts-Deodorant-Bergamot-Protection-Aluminum-Free/dp/B018K3ATKE/ref=sr_1_5_s_it?s=beauty&ie=UTF8&qid=1469539444&sr=1-5&keywords=schmidt%27s+deodorant" target="_blank">Natural Deodorant</a>- I've not been one to find myself immersed in natural products for the most part but this caught my eye somewhere so I decided to give it a go. It works BETTER than the Dove deodorant that I've been using for years. Not only does it smell divine, but it has strong, lasting power too. Hopefully it's better for my body, too! With the Dove, it didn't seem to stick well and I'd almost always reapply when I got to school, so hopefully I won't need a extra stick in my desk this year. :)<br />
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<a href="https://www.amazon.com/Vitamin-Serum-Hyaluronic-Professional-Wrinkles/dp/B00GQ9I9IO/ref=sr_1_12_s_it?s=beauty&ie=UTF8&qid=1469539570&sr=1-12&keywords=vitamin+c+serum+for+skin" target="_blank">Vitamin C Face Serum</a>- Miracle worker. No joke. MAJORLY visible results on my forehead wrinkles and I do see more glow overall. For how little you use each night (just a couple of drops) the bottle lasts so, so long.<br />
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<a href="https://www.amazon.com/Philips-HP6401-Satinelle-Epilator-White/dp/B00742JW8S/ref=sr_1_1_s_it?s=beauty&ie=UTF8&qid=1469539639&sr=1-1&keywords=phillips+epilator" target="_blank">Epilator</a>- Officially hooked. I won't lie- the first time you use it you might regret the purchase (It's probably along the same pain level as getting a tattoo? I don't have any, but that's what I imagine.) Then, though...THEN!!! It's an easy breezy process and over time your hairs get weaker and thinner. I'm never going back to razors for my legs!! (Sidenote: the first time you use the epilator, you do want your hair to be grown out a little bit....you can't do it on freshly shaven legs or it won't work.)<br />
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<a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B004W2S6YO/ref=s9_dcacsd_bhz_bw_c_x_2" target="_blank">Dry Shampoo</a>- I think perhaps I've blogged about this dry shampoo before, but it's truly the only one that works the way that I want it to. I will say that my hair gets super duper greasy after just one day, so most dry shampoos just don't get rid of that for me. This one totally does, though, and it also volumizes which is perfect.<br />
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<a href="https://www.amazon.com/gp/product/B00OJ7U96A/ref=s9_acsd_hps_bw_c_x_7" target="_blank">Dr. Teals Epsom Salts</a>- Love these for when I'm feeling sore or just want to unwind a bit. I get them at Target, although there's a larger variety available online. They also have a liquid bubble bath version that I enjoy.<br />
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Later this week or next week I'll have a post up with our favorite toddle products for Avery. Tell me- have you tried any of these already or do you think you will!? Any recommendations to add to the list?Mariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5656637155142534668.post-73672344095415128702016-07-29T19:28:00.001-07:002016-07-29T19:32:38.185-07:00On RelationshipsOh, where to start....<br />
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Relationships are something that I've been consistently working on for many years now. Really, when you think about it, they are the ground zero of life. Every single daily interaction is based upon some form of a relationship with another human being (or four-legged friend!). Home, work, social lives- they all revolve around the way me make other people feel and vice versa.<br />
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For a long time, relationships seemed like a banking system to me. Now, I didn't think about it from this perspective at the time, but sitting here trying to think of an accurate representation brings banking to the forefront of my mind. There are credits and there are debts with people. You do something nice for them and then there is some level of expectation that a kind deed will be reciprocated. Conversely, if someone does something nice for you, you're in debt to them and need to step up to the relationship plate. Of course, even sitting here typing this, it seems absurd. And this is not to say that every relationship in my life played out this way by any means. However, on some level there was this lingering feeling of giving and receiving that many relationships were built upon.<br />
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Along those same lines.....you know how some families are the type that bury their heads in the sand when things get awkward and tough? Both sides of my family are quite the opposite for the most part in that regard. You don't bury your head in the sand- you freaking grab that sand and you hurl it as hard as you can in someone else's face and then you run and don't talk for a long time. These were difficult circumstances to grow up under with extended family (and with my own parents to an extent) and it was truly the only thing I knew.<br />
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And so, you can imagine as a little girl growing up surrounded by this, I learned quickly that anger was not something that was wise for me to express out of the fear of what might be waiting on the other side. Well, twenty five years later, that suppressed anger had manifested itself into some REARING anxiety that truly had to be faced head on. As many of you know if you've been a reader for some time, I ended up seeing a therapist for about four years and it was absolutely life-changing (and I mean this quite literally). I learned that so much of my anxiety was coming from the anger that I had no clue how to handle. The thought of being able to have a straightforward conversation with a family member, friend, co-worker, etc. saying, 'Hey, you hurt my feelings when you said/did XYZ...." was truly unfathomable. Doesn't that seem so silly!? And yet, it was my reality and I've learned that it's a stark reality for a LOT of people in this world.<br />
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Now that I've taken you on a loooong back-road, I want to get to the gist of what I intended to write about. People change. Relationships change. Lives change. This is a good thing!! There is no way that all of us were meant to remain static in our beliefs and actions for our entire lives. However, sometimes relationships become sticky and scary when we change. Perhaps those we love, those we work with, those we respect aren't changing at the same time or in the same direction. It's taken me 29 years to come to grips with the fact that THIS IS OKAY. I repeat! THIS IS OKAY!!! Just as we're not meant to stay fixed for our entire lives, neither are our relationships. They ebb, they flow, they veer right and left and they have to make u-turns- and despite all of the negativity generally associated with these movements, ultimately it can be a good thing.<br />
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Within the movement, there is a level of respect and responsibility that I've discovered I owe to myself and the relationships that I keep. There is a responsibility to speak. Not to yell, not to type/text, not to whisper to someone else- the responsibility to tell someone what is going through your mind. Will it always get you where you want to be in your relationship? Absolutely not. However, despite what many of us conjure up in our heads, people are not mind readers. They cannot get inside your head at any given moment and comprehend what you're processing. <br />
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All this to say: it's a false reality to believe that all of the relationships in our lives will always remain what they currently are. It's unfair to both/all people in a relationship to expect this. Beyond that, though, when the going gets tough, you speak and you listen. You don't hurl sand or mean words. You don't hide behind a screen. You look inside yourself, identify what the root of your own anger or frustration is, and you find a respectful way to voice that. And frankly, if and when you don't get the type of response or feedback that you're seeking, then that can be a signal to take a step back for a bit. Not for forever, but for enough time that you're able to reflect and regroup without saying things that you don't necessarily mean. For me- and I think perhaps for a lot of us- time is the greatest healer. It's <u>not</u> an eraser, but it's a mode through which we're able to process, ebb, flow, turn left/right/reverse, as well as spend some time with our own thoughts before we jump to words and action.<br />
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It's okay for relationships to not always be perfect. It's okay to say that you need time. It's okay to be close and then not be close, so long as there's a level of honesty and respect that's voiced in that movement. Just like the seasons, people change and we owe it to ourselves and those that we're close with to not only acknowledge that, but to also decide openly what we'd like to do with that.Mariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5656637155142534668.post-8286823138345078632016-07-27T04:25:00.000-07:002016-07-27T04:26:23.299-07:00Sappy Anniversary PostBear with me through this sappy post because CP is worth a sappy love post :) All photos are by the amazing Julie Lim.<br />
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Nearly seven years ago, a boy and a girl met one night through mutual friends at Clarendon Ballroom (yes- you read that correctly). After they met that night, said boy asked one mutual friend what said girl likes to do and mutual friend said she was planning on going to Clarendon Day the next weekend. When said girl wrapped up her first ever Back to School Night, she had a voicemail waiting on her phone from said boy asking if she had heard of Clarendon Day and if she might want to go? Sneaky, clever guy.....<br />
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Quite literally, the rest is history. I've never been a "love at first sight" believer but that's pretty much what comes to mind with CP. In so many ways, our personalities could not be more different and yet- and yet!!!- we make it work and we make it work well. Like any couple, we have our moments but there is no one else in this world that I want to work through those tough moments with. Through the fun, the sad, the crazy, the life-altering, we've been one another's rock and I thank my lucky stars every single day that I went to Clarendon Ballroom on that fateful evening in September 2009.<br />
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I could go on and on and on (and on) about how much I love CP, but below is a reading from our wedding that encapsulates the foundation that our relationship is built and stands upon so well. LOVE YOU, Christopher!!! Here's to year three!!<br />
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"May your marriage bring you all the exquisite excitements a marriage should bring, and may<br />
life grant you also patience, tolerance, and understanding. May you always need one another - not so much to fill your emptiness as to help you to know your fullness. A mountain needs a valley to be complete; the valley does not make the mountain less, but more; and the valley is more a valley because it has a mountain towering over it. So let it be with you and you. May you need one another, but not out of weakness. May you want one another, but not out of lack. May you entice one another, but not compel one another. May you embrace one another, but not out encircle one another. May you succeed in all important ways with one another, and not fail in the little graces. May you look for things to praise, often say, "I love you" and take no notice of small faults. If you have quarrels that push you apart, may both of you hope to have good sense enough to take the first step back. May you enter into the mystery which is the awareness of one another's presence - no more physical than spiritual, warm and near when you are side by side, and warm and near when you are in separate rooms or even distant cities. May you have happiness, and may you find it making one another happy. May you have love, and may you find it loving one another."<br />
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<br />Mariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5656637155142534668.post-79286420185925965732016-07-25T11:11:00.001-07:002016-07-25T11:26:06.789-07:00Welcome Home (Again)As some of you may already know, our little Pike crew recently moved into the home that I grew up in. We actually did a true house swap with my mom, where she is living in our townhouse and we are living in Falls Church! The thought of the swap was thrown out for discussion long before my dad passed away knowing that CP and I would need more room for a family one day and that my parents would be looking to downsize as they planned for retirement. Leave it to my dad- he had drawings which mapped out where all of their things would go in our tiny townhouse before we even had the wheels spinning in motion on the swap! While I'm sad that my dad doesn't get to experience Fairlington, it's the memories like him planning the move that are so classic. Anyhow, it's been two months now since we did the swap so it feels like a good time to check in on how things are going with the change.<br />
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I think it's worth addressing the biggest elephant in the room first. Yes- this is the house where my dad passed away. Naturally there are a LOT of loaded emotions that accompany that fact. For me, though, the enormously overwhelming emotions are gratitude and connection. I am so, so grateful that I'm able to live in this house again and the sense of connection that I feel with my dad here is indescribable. When my mom was moving out, I asked her if she planned on taking my dad's ashes with her. It wasn't something she'd thought about yet and after some time she decided to leave them here since all of our memories with dad are here. While I don't walk up to the mantle and have daily discussions with my dad, it's heartwarming and encouraging to be with him every day. Some friends and acquaintances have asked if it's awkward or creepy living in what I think they consider to be a haunted house and I frankly feel quite the opposite way. All in all, both my mom and our little family have settled in so well to our (old) new homes and that makes my heart so happy.<br />
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Before we even had any boxes unpacked, CP went to TOWN on building his garden. Whereas I have a black thumb that kills any living thing by just looking at it, CP has a green thumb that cannot be beat! We have 8 tomato plants of all varieties, cucumbers growing up some special lattice device that I have never even seen before, peppers, jalapenos, squash, zucchini, pumpkins, black raspberries, and many herbs including purple basil, rosemary, cilantro, basil mint (basil that grows and looks like mint), and LEMON BALM. You guys- lemon balm is the bomb. Seriously. The smell is just heavenly and we've had such fun mixing it into many cocktails this summer.<br />
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Along with the thriving garden, CP has his official man cave in the unfinished part of the basement where he essentially has a bike shop set up! There have been nights when I've come home thinking he's asleep when in fact he's plugging away on his bikes downstairs. Sloan and Avery are in heaven with a large backyard and we love our neighbors- some of whom have been here since I was little :) One of my favorite parts of the move is that I can walk (!!!!!) Avery to and from daycare each day. This is life altering in so many ways. I sort of don't want to send her to preschool if it means we have to drive her, haha. I kid....but she might be four before she makes it there!<br />
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For the most part, the house is still a mess and we're trying to figure out where we want to go with certain projects but more than anything we love it here and feel so fortunate to be back on the block. It's uncommon for people to have the opportunity to live in the house that holds so many memories from growing up and I think we're all thanking our lucky stars that the swap worked out for all of us. It certainly feels like home for me and CP, Avery, Sloan and I are looking forward to building new and exciting memories here to add to those that already exist.<br />
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<br />Mariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5656637155142534668.post-19074904726408376042016-07-11T04:01:00.000-07:002016-07-11T04:24:25.271-07:00Adjusting to SummerThis time last year, Avery was just about three months old and we were finally starting to hit a semblance of a routine as she discovered the difference between night and day and CP and I felt somewhat human again. I knew that I had two more months home before I returned home to work and looked forward to taking it easy and continuing to discover what exactly the whole parenting gig involved (poop....so much poop!).<br />
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The beginning of this summer has looked quittttte different. I want to preface the rest of this post by saying that in so many ways, I am extremely fortunate- we have a healthy, happy baby who is the light of our lives. Avery continues to make every single day count and I'm more than excited to spend lots of time with her this summer. To that end, the last two weeks have been a major adjustment for the both of us! Both of our routines normally consist of heading to daycare/work at 8am and spending the day with others before we see each other again around 5pm. Since school has let out, though, I've been experimenting with the stay at home mom gig and it has been different. I'm certainly not complaining about it....just simply being honest.<br />
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I've always been confused by the phrase "I don't know how you do it, ____________ - stay at home with your child(ren), work a full time job while raising kids, have seven kids, run ultra marathons, travel all week for work. Like most things in life, when there's a will there's a way and hopefully personal happiness and health aren't put on the back burner in the process. I have the will to make this summer fun with Avery during the weeks that we're home together and now I'm finding the way. Admittedly, it has been more difficult than I envisioned but we're getting there. :)<br />
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Many parent-teachers will probably agree that the exhaustion at the end of the school year runs a close second behind having a newborn child. Instead of waking up and being pretty lazy and then also indulging in a looooong afternoon nap, I'm more or less on all day and trying to figure out how to keep Avery entertained and happy. It finally dawned on me that Avery probably misses her daycare buddies (they are quite the crew!) as well as her caretakers there, too. Fortunately she's going to spend some weeks with them this summer and in the meantime we're finding entertaining ways to fill our days. My friend Sarah who is a SAHM also <span style="text-align: center;">speaks teacher language and told me to take each day like I would at school- break it into little chunks and fill those with different activities instead of having the day end up as one big blur of chasing down a toddler. You guys, I've been teaching for seven years and this did not even occur to me to try with my own child! Granted, we DO leave the house (I promise!) and do lots of different things, but breaking it down into a written (loose) schedule gets both of our days started off on the right foot. </span><br />
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SO- the summer adventures continue! On the weeks I'm home with Aves, you'll find us on long walks with Sloan, perusing the aisles of Target, walking laps at the mall on the barn burner days, going to the pool, pulling every single piece of tupperware onto the kitchen floor to organize it, and snuggling- lots and lots of snuggling! To my stay at home mama friends out there- I know how you do it. You pour your heart into every single day and I love you for it!<br />
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Here's to the rest of the Summer 2016! Oh- and to lots of homemade cocktails with ingredients from our garden at the end of the extra long days.<br />
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PS. At Avery's 15 month checkup appointment last week, she confirmed that she continues to be OFF the charts in her height....and not close behind in her weight. You do you, girl!!<br />
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<br />Mariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5656637155142534668.post-64905706987855178592016-06-21T18:29:00.000-07:002016-06-21T18:35:43.339-07:00AdieuChipmunks,<br />
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Here we are at the end of another school year. This one has been uniquely special for me, as it's the first year that I was both a full time teacher and full time mama. Truth be told, it took longer than it normally does for me to <i>really</i> get to know you all this year. Trying to juggle being teacher and mom is no joke and definitely did me in at different points throughout the school year. That being said, I wouldn't trade this year for anything in the world because once I hit my stride, I was able to fully realize what amazing young adults and students you are!<br />
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There are a lot of you in sixth grade this year and it's been amazing to watch every single one of you grow, literally and figuratively. Whenever the stress of the job started to do me in, I reminded myself of why I show up here every day: for <u>you</u>! It seems as though the field of teaching is experiencing a crisis right now in that the cons to the job are outweighing the pros. The notion that teachers are "lucky" that they get the summers off is a farce when you consider how many hours a week every teacher that I know pours in to their job. People don't see the teachers who get home, cook dinner, perhaps change some diapers and do a bedtime routine, and then jump on their laptop for 2-3 hours to develop lessons plans for the next day and reply to emails. They don't see the first year teachers who show up hours before school starts and stay until the wee hours of the night as they try to keep their head above water. And that's okay! It's not that everyone is expected to see and acknowledge the blood, sweat, and tears (and yes, all three are part of the job on a regular basis). Rather, it's a reminder for me of how amazing every single teacher is, in that they really are here for the kids. It's not a nice paycheck keeping people here, it's not the easy and flexible hours, it's not the telework options (one day?!), and it's certainly not the ability to use the bathroom or vending machine whenever we want to :) . It's you, kiddos!<br />
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As we discussed several times this year, my standard of success for you is not measured in scores and grades. Instead, it's marked by the amazing growth that you've made this year as you've blossomed into young adults. When you think back several years from now and reminisce about your sixth grade year, you may remember a fact here and there from US History or Science. More importantly, though, I hope that you remember and reflect on the class discussions that we had about what it means to be a classmate, what it looks like to be a kind and respectful person, and what it takes to be nice and to work hard. I know each and every one of you are going to go on to do amazing things in life. This is going to look very different for each of you, but that's what makes each of you so special and memorable. I will always look back on this year with fond memories.<br />
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Just as you're heading out the doors of Chesterbrook, I am as well. I'll be packing up Room 206 which as been home for seven years and heading to a different school next year. This is incredibly bittersweet for me, as I love this little Chipmunk community so much. Change is good, though, and I'm looking forward to new and exciting opportunities.<br />
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As I head out the door with you this year, I wanted to share some of my most favorite quotes that relate so, so well to teaching and learning....<br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "lora" , serif; font-size: 18px; line-height: 26px;">“Let us remember: one book, one pen, one child and one teacher can change the world.” — Malala Yousafzai</span><br />
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<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "lora" , serif; font-size: 18px; line-height: 26px;">“The meaning of life is to find your gift. The purpose of life is to give it away.” — Pablo Picasso</span><br />
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xox Mrs. Pike (or Miss Micocci to some of you, still!) aka your crazy iced latte loving teacher<br />
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<br />Mariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-5656637155142534668.post-77234186263328887542016-06-13T14:28:00.000-07:002016-06-13T14:28:19.874-07:00Avery at 14 (!) MonthsThroughout the first year of Avery's life, we got our fair share of the "Savor every moment- it flies by!" comments. Truth be told, though, it didn't feel as though it was flying by! Maybe it's because I was home for the first five months or because she was changing so much and so often, but it just didn't seem as though she was born one minute and turning one year old the next. Also, I think the fact that many people celebrate each month's progression as a sort of milestone made time slow down.<br />
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Now, though? I GET IT!! I totally get it! She was turning one yesterday and now she's fourteen months old! Or shall I say 1.16 :) Really, though- she's becoming such a little person now and it's amazing to observe and be a part of it all. As some of you know, we recently moved (more on that soon!) and my commute is now three minutes, whereas it used to be anywhere from 30-45 on the dreaded Route 7. This means that most mornings I'm awake with Avery from 6-8am, which is so special to me. It's a time when we get to say bye to CP as he heads off to work (and Avery glues herself to the front door to watch him cycle off), watch some of the Today Show together, and drink our respective morning beverages alongside one another (#allthecoffee for mama, milk for Aves).<br />
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As much as I'm looking forward to summer and spending lots of time with Avery, I also really value the fact that she gets to see her parents get ready to go to work every day. This is something that I really admired in my parents growing up and appreciate way more so now that I'm an adult. While I didn't experience having a stay at home mom or dad, I know it's something that my friends who <i>did </i>experience<i> </i>also equally admire about their family. I want Avery to know that our family is always numero uno and that putting a family first looks different for many people!<br />
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Okay, now onto some random tidbits about the Mean Mugger.....<br />
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-Avery contracted hand, foot, and mouth disease last month and....EW! I had barely even known what it was before we were dealing with it and of course Dr. Google was a TON of help (I say that half-jokingly.. Fortunately since we knew what we were dealing with, it didn't list death as the #1 symptom). After a few days of r&r, though, we were back on track.<br />
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-We went to the pool for the first time this season recently and Avery did not hate the water! I didn't try putting her on her back and I'm not sure that I'll try to anytime soon since she screams bloody murder every time I try it in the bath. Any advice from seasoned veterans out there?!<br />
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-We have season tickets for the Nats and going to the ballgames this year is SO much different than going last year! Fortunately we're not at the point yet where Avery is super squirmy and she actually does a great job, but long gone are the days of a ten pound infant sleeping on us for four hours straight at the park. Fortunately there's lots of yummy food there to keep her entertained.<br />
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-Avery and Sloan's relationship is really starting to bud and it's pretty adorable. We're still working on gentle rubs, but for the most part Sloan takes the slaps, too, and recently Avery has started bear hugging Sloan which melts my heart.<br />
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-We still don't have a walker, but we do have a runner when Avery is holding someone's hands :) I'm sure it won't be long now and we're soaking up the last days/weeks of being able to track Avery down quickly. That being said, I did "lose" her recently only to discover her in the linen closet - ha!<br />
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Avery got to meet her buddy Owen recently! I think technically A&O are second cousins (Becca is CP's cousin). Lots of fun adventures with one another await these two!</div>
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Alice and Avery chillaxin' at the pool together </div>
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The definition of hangry</div>
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<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4czLpphzdPO6ZfUSFBVX5Z-THzvm0-5-f5L812YlycewA3hUMN2cLMh5TOmW3fm-Jrnpy5Jc5zTGk_KY6lVSCS5c2_Be7MQpOo8dRfsgrYZlygpxidsQs8lIM4rhc7XpfskSmRbEVZoir/s1600/IMG_9986.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4czLpphzdPO6ZfUSFBVX5Z-THzvm0-5-f5L812YlycewA3hUMN2cLMh5TOmW3fm-Jrnpy5Jc5zTGk_KY6lVSCS5c2_Be7MQpOo8dRfsgrYZlygpxidsQs8lIM4rhc7XpfskSmRbEVZoir/s320/IMG_9986.JPG" width="240" /></a></div>
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"Helping" around the house</div>
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<br />Mariahttp://www.blogger.com/profile/11683859912927250622noreply@blogger.com3